Heartbroken and crushed, how can someone change so fast and so much?

My boyfriend - now ex :( and I had an argument at the weekend after he canceled our plans together to get high and drunk with his friends. We had a massive argument and didn't speak for a couple of days, he said then that he's sorry he needs time to think and some space. Last night I reached out to him and told him this had to stop, what's going on with us. My heart literally snapped into a million pieces when his reply was just leave me alone! I asked him what the hell was wrong with him and that I deserved an explanation considering we were pretty serious! We had spoke about marriage and kids not long ago. He was telling me he loved me up until that night, he told me last night he's sorry but he doesn't want to be with me anymore. I was devastated but kept my emotions in check and asked him why and what had changed over 3/4 hours he said he was sorry but he needs space and that he doesn't love me anymore. This guy was telling me he loved me Saturday before he left for work and now says this! He said he had felt that way for a wee while so I asked why did he not just say? Why be so lovey dovey as usual? He said he didn't know. We haven't spoken since last night hearing that. My heart is in tatters. We had planned a life together and hearing him say that out of the blue is sole destroying!! Its taken everything in me to try and remain strong but I am seriously low and feel suicidal at my worst. Tomorrow he will be attending a wedding we were both invited too, I'm not going now but he will still be there. I'm absolutely heartbroken and hope to god he gets in contact saying he's made a mistake. I have to drive his things over to his friends where he is now staying, I honestly think I will break down if I see him. How can things change so fast. I dont know what to do at all. What do you do when your life is planned out with someone and then they leave?

Updates:
I've seen photos on social media of him at the wedding with the rest of the ushers and its just crushed me :( I thought I was doing better but I'm not. I hate that he looks so happy and carefree whilst I'm heartbroken in tears!! We've spoken everyday for as long as I can think back and now having only had NC since Thursday night its tearing me apart. I'm such a mess 😭

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Most Helpful Guy

  • People don't change their mind in a couple of hours when it comes to how they feel about it each other but there could be multiple reasons why he did what he did. You just have to realize that it's not your fault!

    I have seen guys that have broken up with their girlfriends after they went hunting with their dads, hug out with their friends, or even when their family told them too. Sometimes guys also just see single guys that do what they want whenever they want and decide that's the lifestyle they want. Other times guys are just immature it does take us longer to grow up for the most part that's life.

    Try to do things to take your mind off of him go to the movies, hangout with friends, do whatever you can you can to make yourself feel good. Don't put yourself down and don't let bad thoughts get the best of you if you need to talk to someone do it.

    Even if this relationship there are lots of other guys out there you will meet someone who will make you happy and treat you right. It's always real tough after a break up especially when we like someone but you will get through it.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm really sorry that happened. I don't know either. Maybe his friends said something to him about you to change his mind? That happened to my sister. If he does wake up take things slow don't get hurt worse. I wish I had better advice.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Sorry for what happened. It's a painful thing which make u wondering about the reasons and what a happened. but you've to be happy because he showed what was inside himself (a weak personality) before too late. Don't worry, what a happened not because you're a bad person, but to make you loving yourself first then others.
    I understand that you're now facing a lot of choices, but you should take a step forward, manage your emotions and take a time to be free and to be just yourself.
    never look back.

    Good luck...

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