Why is it so hard to break up with someone?

Been with this guy for almost a year now. But we're very different and incompatible. Every time I want to break up, I convince myself that I have to work harder and save the relationship. We are in a fight now and he won't talk to me. I want to break up with him. But he's the best guy I've met so far and it's so hard.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • But we're very different and incompatible - But he's the best guy I've met so far and it's so hard. *scratches head*

    If you are very different and incompatible then nothing will ever change, you're not the right fit and as hard as it is, you have to suck it up and just do it now and not years down the line because it will only get harder and harder.

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    • I know it's a bit confusing, but I'm in love with him and all we do is fight.

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    • I regret that I won't be able to find a better guy. What if this is the best I can get? We're very different people, but he's a genuinely nice guy and I do Iove him. Besides, is there a right reason to be in a relationship?

    • How do you know you won't be able to find a better guy? I can't answer that question, if you feel like settling and being stuck in a relationship where you seem unhappy and fight a lot then by all means stay in the relationship, maybe it'll get better! Maybe you'll grow together and those differences will go away! You should be in a relationship because you want to be with the person, because being with that person makes you happier etc. So yes, I believe there are right and wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

Most Helpful Girl

  • i know exactly how you're feeling, but i ended up forcing mysself to do it. i told myself i had to be a little bit selfish. like you, i kept holding on for a long long time doing anything i could to make it work, but i couldn't force it for much longer.

    first thing ill say if ur gonna break up, the reason MUST be legitimate. if it's a fight u can get through with some discussion, tough love, or a bit of time apart, then work on it some more. if it's just at it's end and u feel your love for him will never return, then work up the courage to say "I'm done". he can't force u to be with him, and u deserve happiness from a man who can give it to you.

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What Guys Said 1

  • this isn't uncommon. plenty of people are with people they probably shouldn't be with. if you are a person who wants to be in a relationship (and most humans are) it can be difficult to give up something, even that's bad, because at least it IS something. being with him is a "known" while breaking up leaves you in an "unknown".

    but the simple fact is if you don't break up you won't be able to realize what's really out there for you.

    "But he's the best guy I've met so far"
    he may be but he's not the guy for you and as long as you're with you won't know if there is (and i'm sure there is) something better for you

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