Is he just scared of getting hurt? Does he still care?

okay so I started seeing this guy about a month ago, we started off my talking on the phone every day and Skype literally all night and then we met up and spent 8 hours together when we were just supposed to have coffee than the second time the same thing, the third time we met we kissed (same night he met my family, cause he came for dinner and I still live at home) I initiated it though. Anyway he stayed over and then after that we were seeing each other almost everyday, the next weekend he came to a party with my friends there and he asked me to be his girlfriend and I told him that I usually jump into things quickly and that I'm not seeing anyone else but could the labels wait for a while and he said that was fine and to take as much time as I needed. And that he would be there. He told me how much he liked me, and we got along great and he would say it's awesome cause we're basically the same person. Anyway I knew from the beginning that he was going away for five weeks in January for army reserves (doesnt mean he's going into the army, its just like training for people who might want to one day) and I told him that I would miss him and he kept saying that it would fly by. I went for dinner at his on Monday night we had breakfast Tuesday and chilled at mine all day and everything seemed really really good. He then told me that the five weeks away is like boot camp and they take your phones away and I was like oh my god five weeks without talking thats so long and I said I'd miss him and he said he'd be back before I knew it

anyway so we were joking around and I accidently called him my boyfriend and he didn't say anything so I said "thats if you still want to be?" and he said "if you still want me to be when I get back" so he couldnt stay cause he had army reserve training that night but he said "dont worry this is the last one for the year so i'll be free every Tuesday night from now on" he left then sent me a snapchat of test results he got back
we joked about him coming back for a quickie and he snapchatted me after army reserves a little and also on Wednesday and Wednesday night after soccer he snapchatted (we talked a lot on snapchat) me his injuries and then a picture of body wash he said his mom had bought for me. Thursday I woke up knowing something was up and half way through the day he sent me a snapchat that said "sorry I've been feeling a bit bleh lately" and I thought he meant sick so I texted him and asked if we were okay
and he said were fine so I called and asked him what was up and he said the same thing and then said he thought about it and doesn't know if he is ready for what we are, he mentioned something about him going away and how it wouldn't be fair on either of us. He said he wanted to be friends and maybe see what/if something happens. I called him again later because I was really confused I mentioned something about having feelings and he said "well i guess if i'm not ready then that means I dont"


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  • That's a tough one. It sounds like maybe he reached a point where he was feeling it a little less. Jf only he'd just speak plainly.

    Have you tried asking him specifically why the change of heart when he was ready to be your boyfriend before?

    It does sound like you guys talk a lot and spent a lot of time together or chatting so mayne he's burnt out from it? Maybe he sensed that your feelings were stronger than his.

    It'd be nice if he would just say straight up what he's thinking and feeling


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