I just discovered my Husband has been cheating on me with his ex while I'm 6 months pregnant. He says I was not fulfilling his needs as a wife. That I spent to much time with my family, didn't cook enough, didn't clean enough, didn't contribute enough financially and wasn't affectionate enough towards him. Did I really neglect him as a wife and push him away?
Most Helpful Guy
As an outsider, it is hard for me to tell whether your behaviour caused him to cheat. Now let's assume all seven accusations are true, he may have a very strong case. That's not to say his cheating is excusable. But the reasons are strong grounds for any man or woman to experience emotional deprivation.
That said. I am really not sure if one of those accusations could alone cause someone cheating. I'm referring to not doing household chores, not cooking and not contributing financially. To me, these three reasons are flimsy, and merely attempt rationalise his cheating.
Where I could have sympathy for him is you spending much time with your family as opposed to spending time with him. It may have left him feeling alone and probably feeling like an outsider in your marriage.
Not being affectionate enough is hard to quantify because what is enough to one person is a sense of lack to another. Only you alone can truly determine whether you displayed insufficient affection towards him.
Studies have shown pregnancy can weaken the bonding between couples. Some men find their pregnant partners undesirable. Some pregnant women experience a drop in libido. That could also have caused him to cheat.
I'm of the thinking that it is a combination of those accusations (assuming if they are true) that could have fuelled his cheating.1
Most Helpful Girl
A cheater doesn't need a reson to cheat, but he/she will grasp at anything to justify his/her actions. Don't fall for it. My ex did the exact same thing. They need to make themselves feel better about what they did, so they feel no guilt. Do NOT let him blame you for HIS actions. We are responsible for ourselves and nobody else can make us do something that we don't want to do.5