Most Helpful Girl
It depends which side of the divorce you are on. I'll be the opposite of other opinions posted so far in that I got over him and the marriage before I even left. We had a kid so I made the mistake of trying to fix things for her sake. I realised there was really nothing left to save and gave him 6 months to prove me wrong (we had a conversation). At the end of this we both knew it was over, although I accepted it and he didn't.
Because I had a child in tow and complications with my employment contract I couldn't find anywhere to live. He refused to move out saying I wanted to end it not him, so we spent another 6 months living together after splitting up. By the time I finally got out I could happily have never spoken to him again.
We divorced completely last month after a 2 year separation (the cheapest way to do it as you can't contest). We've managed to remain amicable for the kid, but it was touch and go at times. I was over it by the time I'd moved out. I didn't start seeing anyone else for 18 months though. I wanted to focus on stabilising things for our kid.
He seemed OK with it, although he hit a major low. He was diagnosed with bi polar, which he said was a factor in our split. When I told him I was seeing someone else (18 months later remember) he lost it completely. Started threatening to divorce me for adultery and get full custody of the kid, neither of which he would have been able to follow through on. It took him about a month to calm down. I think that was when he finally accepted it was real, not a temporary thing.
He's now seeing someone else - they've been together about 3 months now. Things have settled down and I'd say he's finally over it. It does depend whether you're the divorce or divorcee but either way you will both get over it and move on.1