I love my boyfriend to a point where I thought I could never feel for anyone. But the thing is, our relationship has been going down...At first it was great then we hit the 5th month, from then on it was like our relationship was having PMS. I had problems with the fact that we don't see each other enough because of school and the fact that he doesn't share with me. I also hate the fact that he compares me to other people and is so scared to be open to me. I feel hurt and unsatisfied. I know I have my flaws too and those are my flaws. Is it normal for me to feel this upset about this? we've been together for nearly 8 months now. And our monthsary is coming up, as well as Valentine's Day. But I decided to ask for a break, and not because I wanted it, but because I knew he wanted it. I love him so much but I'm scared he would lose his feelings for me during this break. I don't have enough confidence in him because of things I've experienced in the past with him( ignoring me when we fight or not telling me our date was not to be and hanging out with friends later or simply by being angry at me to a point where he's swearing at me). I honestly don't know what to do. I've blamed myself for this relationship and he lets me blame myself. I know he has flaws but all I do is turn those flaws into my own flaws. Over the time I've dated him, I became "clingy"( asking him to reply faster in our convos, asking him not to go when our date is over) and became suspicious, jealous and not confident. Is this my fault or his? Or is this mostly my fault or his? I'm sorry if I'm not making sense. I'm just really upset, id appreciate comments from both girls and guys.
Should I wait for this 1 month break to be over or talk to him now before Valentine's Day?
What Guys Said 1
You need to free him a little bit - if he's with you and comparing you to other girls you know your safe because he's saying "hey look at her, but your better" so don't be jealous there, as for the break YOU asked for, it's not that he wanted it, it's that you wanted it so YOU did it. Once you understand your decision and take responsibility for it you'll have a healthier relationship.
It shouldn't be to confusing then again love makes people think different and miss some logic.
You say you don't have confidence in him? Your actually saying your the insecure, not confident with your partner; so stop doubting him and support him, it's an old saying but support him and he can do anything, don't leave him on the battle field with his sword and shield alone.
The lowing you off to hang with friends is because your trying to cage a man like an animal, as fondly as most women like to refer to us has dogs, we are not. Lighten up, if he loves you he'll stay with you, if not, then find another man - don't be afraid to know there is someone else besides this one person out there. A common mistake is young ladies in my opinion will either not commit enough (I want him to do everything and make me feel like a woman) or will commit to much thus the (I'll never let him see his friend or be out of my sight, look at another girl). You have to balance these things, you can't just take a jump because this is not a drama show on TV where they act what will happen - those shows you [might] watch are misleading.
In short this is what I said: your being to controlling so give him some freedom before you lose
him. If your one of my friends I'll look forward to the 6+ months of "poor me" or if your a woman I'll just hear "well that wasn't right, lets try again" hence 'if you fail try, try again'
I hope this overall helped you, if it didn't and you feel I focused to much on you the reason is simple; generally men feel caged by the woman and she never lets up, use this as a guide line, but women aren't always the only ones to blame - then again men don't make a stink about something for years on end. [mind you this does not include my father]0
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