Should I be to hard on my girlfriend of 8yrs because she was having phone sex with another guy?

My girlfriend and mother of 3 kids was having phone sex, ig, kik, and alotta apps behind my back and i have trouble believing her on stuff she tells me now, because that is always in the back of my head that she fucked another guy... has anybody ever been through it and was able to let it go and live happy?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • This is immature behavior for a woman who is in her mid-late twenties and has a pretty big family.
    I really think she's not mentally mature enough for a committed relationship.
    I mean, sure anyone can bare a child.
    But she isn't doing right by them, by sneaking around and doing these deceitful acts.

    She doesn't even seem sorry about it because instead of being up front about her behavior she tries to hide it.
    She will continue because she has no remorse.

    You need to have a talk with her, and leave her if she isn't willing to change.
    I doubt that she is willing to change because she seems like the type of woman that will only try to better hide these things so she will not get caught the next time.

    I think it's time you start... doing you and meeting other girls.

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    • End the relationship.

    • I've talked with her about it and she says she did it because she felt lonely i would always work and that i really didn't give her attention, but i told her that is no reason for her to do it, shewas even okay when i told her i was gonna leave her so that is how i know that she has some other shit going on, plus her sister was being a backup in all this its tough

Most Helpful Guy

  • That is disrespectful. I wouldn't even be hard on her honestly because it is just a waste of time. Hell, in fact I would leave her sorry ass. But judging by it, it also seems like you want to work out things with her. Take some time out for yourself and gather your emotions and tell her that you felt disrespected and you are not going to tolerate that kind of stuff anymore. Keep in mind it will probably take some time for you to look past that and if it keeps running through your head. It's time to go, dude. Tread carefully.

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    • Yes i am really having trouble getting past that stage because we do talk about it and alotta things remind me of all she did dude... thanks for your opinion

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    • Yeah i think i might be afraid of taking the next step, trying to see what is out there im scared cuz it would be new to me... but hey like you say its life telling us to move forward

    • I'm confident that you will be just fine.

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What Girls Said 2

  • No honestly one mistake takes year of repair and communication, you'll never truly trust her 100% again and if that's something you're willing to have then okay, there's no guarantee it won't happen again and you may begin to resent her. I understand you can't just decide to leave or even want to because it's your family.

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    • That is the way i am trying to see it as one mistake, and it does take time to heal im in my third month and i feel like giving up... thanks for your advice i will put it in mind to use it

  • I haven't been through this, but I also wouldn't enable my lover to believe that I'll let them do whatever they want digitally by remaining with them. Throw her out.

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What Guys Said 5

  • This is certainly not a right behaviour of a woman who has been in a relationship with you for 8 years, it's strange and certainly immature. Of course you have the rights to be angry.

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  • I'd be hard, that's cheating dude. I mean, if it offends you, that is.

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  • Yea, dude. That's like a direct blow to your man hood. It's like saying your not enough for her. I would keep her around though because of the kids. And I would also ask her why she would do that. If it's to hard for her to tell you, tell her to write it down and give it to you. If it's something she can fix, then cool. You should be willing to forgive anyone.

    But if she did it because of something you are doing or not doing. Then you should look into if it's actually true and valid or if it's all her unreal expectations.

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  • Be thankful you aren't married. Can you support the kids on your own?

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  • Yes you should get rid of her

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