I had a girlfriend for over 3 years and we ended things last June. When we met I was a virgin who never had a proper girlfriend and I was so happy to have her in my life. I have never been a ‘lad’ who goes out to try and get laid or anything.
There were problems and admittedly I never helped with matters. There were lots of small things but I won’t go into detail on those because none of us have time for that.
I have parents who have been married 30 years and I just really struggle with the idea of failed relationships. I didn’t bust my arse to save the one I had so I know that seems contradictory.
I am just really struggling to move on at a time when I need to. I am going travelling to New Zealand for a few months in just a few days. She has a new boyfriend and I just feel a bit numb. I know people will say ‘oh it is normal’ etc and ‘time heals’ but it has been many months. The main issue is I don’t know how I should feel.
I have loads of emails we exchanged, some nice and some when we broke up. I have loads of photos and stuff she bought me. I don’t look at them every day nor do I have them on display, but I don’t know whether to get rid or keep.
Bottom line: I spent 3 years (which to me is quite a long time) with a girl I did love. Although I know it is for the best that we broke up, I just don’t know how to emotionally move on. People say you learn from everything, yes you maybe do but we don’t enter them just to learn do we?
I am actually a very strong person but I can be very over analytical, but that is me.
So you have sex with this person you love, spend great times together over a substantial period of time…. Then it is just gone. What was the point if just to ‘learn’ from it. 3 years ago I loved her and didn’t enter the relationship just to learn from it