Did he play me or does he need space and will come back?

I was seeing this guy for 4 months. I am 20 and he is 21.
His past relationship was not really a good experience for him. The girl cheated on him and they were in 3 years relationship. He says that he regret those 3 years because he couldnt focus in school, everytime he wanted to be with his friends, he was stuck with her.
We called off our last relationship, a year before we met. He told me on the second meet up that he doesn't want to commit yet and I agreed and we decided to wait. We use to meet every week, sometimes twice a week.
But everyday I was insecure about not being official yet. Due to my past experiences, I badgered and irritated him with questions about making us official. To which at one point he even told me that he has priorities and he is not genius like me who could focus of school and give everyone including him time and attention. He also stated if I can't respect his priorties, go talk to someone else. I promised him I wouldn't do it again. But weeks later I again did the same thing.
Also, we did use to make out with each other. I was a virgin and he respected my wish of not having sex, saying that he doesn't need sex from me at all. But this December, I lost it to him. I started trusting him and he understood me better than myself. It just felt right.
He once stated that I dont listen to him and he also told me that he likes everything in me but just dont lie to him and he knows when I lie.
On New years, he was sick but I still made him stay with me till 4 in the morning. I was really selfish that night, we did have sex and next day he mentioned how he did not want to have sex and did it for me. I accidently stated that I am scared to lose him. Should not have done that.
Few days after I asked him if we are distant, he said that we are and he is not interested anymore.
He is not replying to me ever since, I apologized and asked for another chance.
My blazer is at his place and I asked him to leave it on my door, he is not even doing that.

I ran into in at the station and confronted him about us. He told me that its his last year and he needs to really focus as his marks were not great last semester. Also problems in his family. He asked me for space and he will message me after the semester. He will make a terrible boyfriend right now he says. I met his family. I was the first girl he brought home. I pulled him and made out for 30 sec and he pulled back saying No intimacy for me. Should I wait for him?


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What Girls Said 2

  • Sounds to me like he was really just stringing you along. Nobody is too busy or occupied to be with the love of their love. I'm pretty much living proof of that. I'm currently doing my honors year at uni while working a 9-5 job. On top of all that I still make time for family, friends and my boyfriend. So I really just don't buy into his excuses. You sound like such a dedicated lovable person and then he's just there totally abusing the love you have for him. I don't think he was "playing" you as he told you from the start that he can't commit. You should have taken that as a warning sign. If he can make time for you once or twice a week then I don't see how he can't make time to actually commit to you. He was selling you short. He was trying to have his bread buttered on both sides. He really sounds exactly like the last guy I was seeing before my boyfriend. He also used to make me feel like shit for having feelings and only now do I realize that I never deserved a guy who didn't even want to commit to me in the first place. You should realize it too. You can do SO much better. I don't even know why you are apologizing to him. He's a big boy and could have left if he wanted to. It's not like you stood there with a gun.

  • You should listen to him. Also, just calm down he will call you. You are a caring and loving individual but just listen more next time but he going call. Text him you understand and you are there when he is ready to talk. Then wait. He will be back.