Am I carrying around false hope?

we dated for 3 years. he said things like we would get married & he knew he could never find anyone like me. i developed depression & anxiety & I began to lose friends. he never liked to be honest with me bc he was afraid to hurt my feelings. he started wanting to see me less often & party w/ friends. he cheated on me, which he swore he would never do, & lied about it & kept it a secret for a month. one time @ a party I was upset & started crying. I saw a text to "Stacy", saying "OMG i am done w/ her I swear to god". him and Stacy liked each other b4 we started dating. they had class 2gether & went 2 lunch to do hw a lot. he admitted to cheating on me w/ "Debra" & broke up w/ me. he said he'd always love me & we'd end up 2gether. I found out he had sex with Stacy a week after breaking up w/ me. but he was still telling me he loved me & wanted 2 b w/ me in the future. we hung out a few times & it was as if I was still his girlfriend. @ his grad party i felt overwhelmed bc Debra and Stacy were there & his family was giving me hugs, saying they missed me & asking if I was ok. this made upset & began to cry & crossed his face off in a pic. b4 going 2 college he said we r done 4 good & I need 2 move on & he didn't care if we ever saw each other again. he came home 4 Christmas & we hung out 5 times after that. now he admitted he was using me for sex and said he had no feelings. he said him and Stacy were still a thing & he has been cheating on her w/ me. Stacy lives in AL and he lives in IL. both in college and they only see each other when she is visiting friends in WI but they text a lot. they only hang out at parties. he told me things w/ her wouldn't b the same as they were with me (meaning not as serious) & he couldnt see himself ending up w/ her. is there any way in the far future he may realize he made a mistake and come back? he used to be a great guy. his mom told me that she thinks one day he will realize he made a mistake by letting me go

  • Absolutely no chance of mending things, he has changed and will never come back, move on.
    Vote A
  • It's possible in the future he may want to give things another shot because of the things he said to you.
    Vote B
  • Only time will tell, if it's meant to be it will happen.
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Girl

  • What an ass. He doesn't deserve you.
    I've been through a bad break up similar to this so i honestly know how hard it is. You're still in love with them, yet you know how badly they treated you. But you need to be strong and make yourself happy. Ignore him completely until you love yourself and are fine without him, only then will he realize what he's lost. Don't reply to any messages or calls he sends you, refuse to meet up. He is still trying to use you and treat you badly.
    Even his family know how amazing you are, and what he's losing by not being with you. But the only person who you want to see that, can't for his own ego and selfishness.
    Trust me when i say you'll be happier without him. All this stress, all the crying, all the pain over a guy that treats women like this? It will be so difficult for the first month but trust me it gets easier.
    If, you still want to be with this guy. Only conisder it after a month of not being in contact or anywhere near him. You need this time to look after yourself. And only consider it if his actions actually show he's changed, not just false promises and words.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • is this not the same one again as last night? it seems the same story again... and yeh his mum might of said that to make you feel better or because she was ashamed of her sons behaviour.


What Girls Said 2

  • NOOO! NOOO! NO! Move the fuck on! I am sorry, he did what after a week? Nope! I run like hell! This guys want to have 2 cakes at the same time and still smile. You can't see if cuz your obviously in love with him! Runnnnn! I got you! (:

  • Sounds like he cheated on stacey with you and that he fears commitment because he feels he is not deserving of one, so he self sabotages them. He seems like, according to what you're typing, that he is exploring things himself and for me with someone like that, I'd steer very clear away. You have your own exploring to deal with and someone like that would just put a damper on it for ya! Cheer up, move on, more boys will come and go!!! <3

    • in the future will he regret this?