Girls, How would you prefer to be broken up with?

Not saying that it won't hurt you but, I'm just wondering what method or phrasing would be ideal in a bad situation?

We seem to be forming a consensus on cold brutal honesty. In much the same way as a prosecuting attorney would go after a witness for the defense. Still everyone being human and all, we seem to forget the man may still care about the feelings of the woman he's come to know. Perhaps even his own. So might their be a softer way of breaking up?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Just quick and easy (not that it really is easy). Break up, explain why, lay out what you want to do moving forward (like, moving out, not seeing eachother anymore, etc). Try to be as calm and respectful as possible, be considerate of their reactions.


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What Girls Said 31

  • There really is no better way other than telling the truth. Sugar coating things, promising to be friends after, all of that is just fluff on top of a really crappy situation.

    The best thing to do is just be honest, give it to her straight, say you are sorry and let it go.

    I've been dumped many times, and it's never an easy thing to go through. I will say that it's good to not drop other terrible news in there too. For example, don't let her know that you are breaking up with her because you met a new girl, someone better, or that you never loved her the whole time you two were together. Not exactly the best time to drop that news. A simple "I'm sorry, but I just don't want to be in a relationship anymore." is enough.

    The thing is, I don't know for other people, but I know for myself, I don't need to talk to you about my feelings after the breakup. I have friends to do that with. People who will see my side of things and console me.

    It will be easier for you both to move on that way. If you tell her to talk to you afterwards and keep a line of contact, it's only going to make it harder to move on.

  • Say it to my face.

    Be like, "I'm not happy anymore. With us. We're just not working and I know we've tried to make it work, but we're just not, and I think it's best if we part ways. And I'm sorry but I respect you and I respect myself and I respect us enough to not continue to put us through this and I wish you the best."

    Or something like that.

  • I would want you to say it face to face. I want you to be honest with me but I still want you to be gentle with my feelings. I'd want you to talk about it with me and answer all of my questions no matter how many there are. And I'd want you to hold me because I'd be crying.

    • *I answered this according to my boyfriend and how I would feel. What is best for me might not be the same for her, but this is what I would want with someone I love.

  • If I were to break up with someone I would do it in the exact way I wanted someone to do it if they were to break up with me. I want an honest and respectful break up. By that I mean hearing the truth even if it will hurt, in person. Don't be mean though, obviously. However some people say they have been thankful when someone broke up with them in a "jerkish" way because it made it easier for them to move on.

  • By being honest and decisive. If he's gonna break up with me, he better have answers to all the questions. When my most recent ex broke up with me, all he had to say was "I don't know" and "I'm sorry". It's the worst kind of break up.

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