Am I unreasonable? Or is he a jerk?

Semi-casual relationship of enjoying eachother's company. I've been encouraging him to pursue his crush. Me-"I never told her about us. " Him-" I think everyone knows. " Me-"After our big fight last week, I told our friends we ended it. " Him-"Aw, you didn't have to. It's not like you can't talk or tell me stuff. And it's not like I hate you or don't care about you or love you. " me-"It would work for your benefit anyway in meeting someone right for you. " Him-"OK I get it. Cool. You can always talk to me." Me-"I still want to see you. I'm just trying to change the way I see it." (I wrote more about my feelings)
Me- I get the feeling that you think I want to stop seeing you. I can't tell if you're not interested in discussing this or if something happened. "Him-"I hear you, thanks for your words". Me-" I don't know what you're thinking, you're being ambiguous. You said I can talk to you whenever I want. Do you mean as friends?" Him, "You're over thinking this." Me- "I was hoping to discuss things and get on the same page and it feels like you're being indifferent." him- "Not being indifferent. You read too much into things, geez. So unnecessary. You jump to your feelings so quickly" . Me-"It feels crappy to share feelings and be met with silence. " Him-" I don't appreciate the accusation that I left you hanging." Me-"You said the same thing before. Why is it some awful accusation when I say it? " Him," I don't appreciate when you jump to conclusions". I pointed out that he did last week, by assuming I judged his culture. He said,"You did judge my culture. " me-" No, you assumed I did. So it's hypocritical. " He said,"You fail to see how you judged my culture. Now you think I gave double standards? Do you believe in reverse racism too? I thought you were different from the behaviors you display. I really do think it's better that we don't spe
That we don't speak " He stopped replying after that. That was yesterday. Am I so unreasonable or is he a jerk? Is it possible he's cooling off?
And I did tell him that I felt like he left me hanging because he walked away for an hour when I was in the middle of sharing how I felt. I accidently did that to him in the past when I fell asleep and he got very upset. But I'm not allowed to get upset when he does it apparently.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Probably cooling off. And he's right, you're really reading too much into his words.

  • He is a jerk


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