The hardest moment of my life, I need help?
What Guys Said 1
He sounds like a loser. I would end things, he's fine with you doing everything and him sitter there while you cook eat and clean. Thats not right you share everything. he's going to hold you back. Its great to see a women on here asking for teamwork /compromising, appreciation/feeling wanted, trust, support. Your in a sinking boat and i would not get on it. I would leave him. Find a guy that will treat you right. Also gain custody of your kids 100%. this way you might be able to never see him again. Do you live with him and is it apt or houes? Love to know more. Just so you know because you have kids doesn't mean you won't find another guy for yourself. I can't have kids so i am looking for a women that already has some. Just saying men like me are out there.
What Girls Said 1
A very, very difficult situation to be in.
First question, and please answer honestly: is there anyone else involved in this? I mean is there a close friendship that has recently developed or have you encountered someone else you could see yourself with? It's often easy to highlight people's bad traits when you have some one justifying and backing up your worries. Not that this is always a bad thing but I'm just curious.
As for your partner: him saying he's an asshole and that it's never going to change is a bullshit excuse to not address his issues. For you to have to do his side of the work of keeping the relationship alive and meaningful.
Basically you have to tell him that if he's residing himself to remain an asshole then you're going to have to leave. Ask him why he thinks anyone would want to spend their life, let alone legally bind themselves (marry) an asshole? Don't let him squirm out and not answer, you deserve an answer. If he can't give you one, if he can't see how wrong the situation is then I suggest you find a way of amicably ending things. Dividing assets and child custody etc is hard, but it's only a temporary difficulty compared to a lifetime of difficulty living with a man you don't love. Also think of your children, you'll be teaching them it's ok to settle for the sake of convenience. That isn't a message I would want my kids to learn.
I wish you all the best in this tough time, but don't walk away too hastily. People can change, especially when they see what is at stake.
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