What's the best way to break up with my boyfriend? The last time I tried, he cried... how do avoid that?

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year now, but I don't believe this relationship is going to work. The first four months were amazing, but the guy that I fell for almost exactly a year ago disappeared. He got too comfortable, and started taking me for granted. When I confronted him about a month ago about our drastic differences and how much things have changed between us first he called me crazy and said I was making things up in my head. When I tried to tell him I didn't think we were going to work and we needed to break up he cried. He insisted we stay together and try to make things work, because it wasn't fair for me to make the decision to break up. Now I feel stuck in this relationship filled with resentment. I feel like he resents me for bringing up the idea of breaking up. Since my failed attempt at a break up tension and awkwardness have only grown over the last month.

I need to break up with him, but I want to do it the right way. What do I do if he tries to guilt me into staying? What do I say?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If he is going to cry, maybe it would be better to break up over the phone, or by text.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Your boyfriend is manipulating you, if he was truly sorry, he would be busting his butt to treat you different (your resentment shows he isn't making an effort). My ex kind of freaked out the 1st time I brought up my discontent and he was so afraid I would break up w/him. After he saw that I wasn't leaving, he continued the behavior to a point where we had a big argument about it and I ended up breaking up w/him a couple days later. Yeah he gave me the heartfelt "I will change" crap a couple days later, but I knew nothing would change. I was done w/the heartbreak. Just break up w/him and don't take him back.

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    • Just to add: if he truly cared about you, he wouldn't neglect you. He only fears losing you due to wanting to have someone and his ego.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Talk to him meet somewhere public and set new rules. Even if the rules are cheesey it will defuse the tension.

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What Girls Said 1

  • the best way to do it~ make a clean break and don't let his tears persuade you to stay.

    also, make it about you (not him): tell him that your relationship clearly isn't working, that you're both still young enough to find happiness elsewhere, and that you need to take care of yourself.

    if he's emotional, doing it in private (and thus letting him keep his dignity) is probably your best course of action.

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