Was the message I sent to my ex mean?

My ex boyfriend broke up with me 1.5 months ago the day before I left overseas to visit my family. He swore at me and said he lost interest in me because my dad didn't like him (they haven't even met-my ex chose not to meet him). I went NC for a month because I was sooo hurt mainly because I also found out he was interested in some other girl at the time. He broke my NC and contacted me 2 days ago by text -"hello, dropping a line. Hope you are alright and doing well." To be honest, I felt angry because I was just beginning to heal inside as I was pretty devastated by the break up. I really did love him. But the NC let me see that he wasn't right for me as he didn't apologise for his behaviour.

I responded with this a day later
"I want to say thank you for your wishes the other day. I was very much surprised, and although it was nice of you, I want you to still respect my need for space. To be honest, Im still angry at you, not because of the decision you made to leave (im glad you made it), but your behaviour was awful towards me and the last thing I remembered of you were the swear words that came out of your mouth before I left overseas. It wasn't okay at all, and frankly, disrespectful. I got no apology and I found it... disgusting. I don't tolerate that behaviour from anyone. Everything, and that moment made me reallse I can't look at you the same way anymore and I realised I no longer have those feelings for you. I sincerely wish you all the best and I want you to do well in life. But seriously, dont ever swear at a lady."

So what do you guys think of the message I sent? I wanted to keep it as classy as possible and be polite.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • No, it wasn't mean at all. In fact it's very well written and plus you expressed yourself in a very mature way.

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    • Thank you :) I'm relieved to have gotten it out. I hope he does learn from it so he doesn't repeat his mistakes.

    • Thanks for the MHO

Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly, you probably shouldn't have responded at all. I know it's hard not to cave, especially when there's something you want to get off your chest, but NC means NC lol, but it's done now. Back to the text, it seems kind of long :-/ sounds like you had a lot to say and it should've been done via phone call, or just keep the text short and vague if you didn't want to talk on the phone.

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    • Thanks for your input! Yea I did think about going NC and talking to him via phone call was another option I considered. But in the past, when I talked to him face to face and when I did phone him before I left overseas, he didn't seem interested in listening and just hanged up sometimes. So he didn't give me the chance. I guess Im the type of person who can't hold it in for long and I want to say what I have to so as not to live life with regret. I can say, Im glad I got it all out now hehee

    • Gotcha. Well if that's the only way to get what you had to say across, then I wouldve done the same thing. I'm glad that it gave you some peace of mind, and I hope he took your message to heart.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • it was good, im glad you sent a message like this to him. he deserves it.

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    • Thanks so much! Me too :)

  • I think it was very politely written. You are a very classy women :)

    Most people would really let their ex have it!

    You will find someone a lot better and someone who actually deserves you!

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    • Thank you so much! Yea, my intention behind the message was to be truthful but polite at the same time... just let everything all out. I don't hate him at all, but I just want him to know it's not okay to treat someone like that :)

What Girls Said 4

  • A bit too lengthy for my taste, but what's important is that you feel like you got everything off your chest. I probably would have said something like that too, but kept it shorter and to the point.

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    • Thank you :) Yea I really needed to get it off my chest. Honestly felt quite happy after that hehe.

  • I was looking for some swear words after every fifth word and there wasn't. You did extremely well. It's a sincere, genuine message, and that message should be an eye opener to your ex. Well done

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    • Thank you! Yea, swear words are not my thing :) Thank you again for your input.

  • I would have ignored it too

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  • Well, if I were you, I'd have completely ignored his text message.

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    • Haha, it did cross my mind. But I did feel like I needed to get everything off my chest because he never gave me that chance. Thank you for your input!

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