Ex or someone new?

to cut a long story short..

- First love, together since 15 for about 3-4 years

- Split up (Ex ended) at about last 4 months, get back together

- Split up (mutual) again due to not seeing each other a lot, and both making no effort

- I start seeing someone new (didn't go very well) but ex came back on the scene

- Thought we had a chance to make things right then suddenly decides he doesn't want anything cause he doesn't want to keep hurting me by being indecisive.

- We just stay friends

- I find someone who I really get on well with, have so much in common, can't actually believe how much we get on from how long we've known each other

- Ex decides to miss me and having a relationship

- Goes away and thinks about what he really wants

( circumstances haven't changed about why we didn't see each other much.. being at uni even though staying at home)

- I decide that I like this new guy, things with ex won't work right now

- ex wants to make me happy and do whatever.

- I tell him its not the right time and I'm with someone else now

= he goes funny with me

- this makes me sad as I feel I don't want to lose him

what do I do?! stay with current new guy or go back to ex

Updates:
Well I got back from work and found he deleted me from Facebook,doesn't want anything to do with me anymore and told me to have a nice life and he can't be anything less than a boyfriend to me.

I'm broken :/

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • I'm in the exact same situation. If you don't believe me, review the questions I've asked in the past and recently, you'll see that it's literally the exact same.

    Regardless, I'm strongly advising you to cut him out of your life respectfully: "John, I've moved on and I won't be coming back. We tried a lot and I am thankful for what you taught me, but I'm done. Good bye"

    And here's why I say this:

    - I'll try and butcher the poor kid she likes. I get EXTREMELY jealous and I try not to be rude, but if he does or says anything to flirt with her infront of me. I get hostile, towards him. Any guy would, but me.. to an extreme.

    I love and care about that girl. But what she is doing isn't fair to herself or me. I told her last week that I really do care for her and want her in my life, only to find out that she hasn't texted or called / swung by the house for almost a week. That, by itself, is reason for me to move on.

    - You said yourself that this guy keeps contemplating if he loves your or not, but that you love the new guy. Sounds to me like you just need to push away your past.

    But I have something VERY personal for you, and I don't want you to take offense and just blow it off. A lot of people will disagree with this, but I have a biased opinion that I want you to hear.

    - For the last 4.5 years of my life, I've loved only one girl, her. She has loved several men. So if you are trying to have him be decisive in who he wants, yet you can't make up your own mind, you're acting like a hypocrite. NOW YOUR NOT, but before you were. You're happy with the new guy, so push away the old guy. Stop hanging on incase something changes. It hasn't changed and it most likely wont.

    I wish you could see the pain in my eyes, the tears down my cheeks and the spirit in my heart. I wish you could see how much I do care, because I bet your ex feels the same way. I bet you that he does know, he just hasn't developed enough to show someone yet... Regardless, that doesn't matter. We are strong and we will survive, it's painful, but it helps us learn. I have to hide my face at work because this means that much to me.

    Take it from me. No one will love her as much as I have loved her. I'll gaurantee that. But if you're happy with someone else, I'm sure he is happy for you. Because I am happy for her, hanging out with the ex-bestfriend of mine, that she exploded my heart with.

    ~ ArtistBBoy

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    • I've thought about this for quite a while and the only thing that is different is the statement about "Uni"... Even though that's in there, I have a strong feeling that this may be someone I know, or someone that knows my situation. It's kinda bothersome that after responding here, my ex called me within the last 30 minutes. Sooooooo hmmmm, maybe just a coincidence.

What Girls Said 1

  • Stay with new guy. He became your ex for a reason

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