What to do with Ex's gifts?

I recently ended a ~4 year relationship. I'm now left with some gifts that she gave me. The thing about my ex is, she was cheap. She never really spent a significant amount of money on me, so most of her gifts are things that she probably spent a lot of time working on - monetary value of said gifts: probably less than $5 a piece.
Anyhow, should I just throw them out? I hate the idea of destroying or throwing away someone else's hard work, even if they don't want it back (not sure if she wants them back or not... probably not).
I'm going to be passing through her city to meet with a friend. So, I was considering boxing up her gifts, and leaving the box in front of her door.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I was jilted two days before my wedding, I hung onto my dress and accessories for a long time, I eventually left them into a cancer research fundraising shop, felt good letting them go and knowing I was making a small difference

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Most Helpful Guy

  • send them back only if you won't regert it. Thats what i did but for me it was the last step to moving on since the break up stuoo bugged me which it still does by the way... Just not as much anYmore.

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    • It has only been a few weeks, but I'm moving on. I think I may have fallen out of love with her some time ago. Anyhow, they're just taking up space now, so either they're going back, or to the bin.

    • Put them in the bin. It sounds like the break up does not really bug u.. So i dont belive you need to send them back you may even want them in the future.

What Girls Said 7

  • No. They were gifts. They were given to you, for you to keep. She does not want them back any more than you want to keep them. If you don't want them, throw them out. Sucks that she worked hard to make them but such is life and that's just the aftermath of a relationship that ended.

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  • Why does it matter how much she spent on making your gifts? I wouldn't care about the price value. If the relationship is over and no chance getting back together, I am tossing that stuff. I cannot hold on to something 'just because.' I have given some stuff back, but what I could not cut up, shred, or sell, I trashed.

    I wouldn't want to drop that stuff off at someone's house unless you were really wanting to run into her or her family. That is asking for trouble or an excuse to get back together. Just simply dispose of it if you are certain of your choice.

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    • The cost of the gifts doesn't matter. I was just saying that she spent time, not money on them. Hence the "should I toss them out"? You're probably right.

  • Burn them. she's just an 'attention whore' remember. Burn up the past and walk away if thats what you want. Go ahead. Finish it. Thats the only way.

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    • Dont send them back. She'll just end up burning them herself.

    • I actually wouldn't mind if she burned them. They were made by her, so she can do as she pleases.

    • dont send them

  • No that would be insulting. Give away or throw away.

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  • I never had one!

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  • Urm no don't give them back. It is more cruel to do that to someone than it is to secretly put them in the bin.

    To her you are still essentially throwing them away. You are making it clear it is no value to you. But you feel better because you didn't put it in the bin.

    Leaving it on the doorstep is for your benefit only.
    Its going to make her even more upset unnecessarily. Not only that she will know you were right there without caring to see if she is ok.

    Yes we know you wouldn't knock as you not wanna make things harder. But she will just take that worse.

    If you can't bear to Chuck them. Put them in a box and out of sight. In the loft, a cupboard. Then when it's less fresh in a few months or more time you won't feel guilty getting rid.

    Like I say, leaving the gifts on the doorstep only serves you to feel better. Yeah you've broken up but you cared about her before. Think about her feeling now and let her heal with out causing additional up set.

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  • There is actually a museum opening up with the gifts of failed relationships.
    donate them: https://brokenships.la

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    • I'm not going to lie, that cracked me up.

What Guys Said 5

  • yeah thats a great idea, you should leave the gifts in front of her door.

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  • No , that seems like your trying to hurt her. Box them up or just keep them as a token of what you once had.

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  • Just toss em, its for your own health. You need to not have little reminders of her laying around.

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  • You should give them away.

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    • That's actually a great idea. I suppose I could remove the photos, toss them out, and give away the albums, frames, etc.

  • I would be devastated if my ex did that. All that love and hard work i put into it. Just keep them

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    • I can see why you would be devastated. However, I see it as a matter of respect. I don't want the next woman I date to find sentimental gifts given to me by my ex. I find holding onto them to be disrespectful.

    • As withmyself seeing that part of the respecr. It's a damned if you do damned if you don't type thing. Regardless of what the outcome is, your still unfortunately damned on it. But unfortunately you'll have to be the ultimate one to decide the lesser of the two

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