How can we prove in court that his ex is controlling and uses her son to get to his father?

Anonymous
On a regular basis if she doesn't get what she wants she will say that he's not getting his son and usually she plays the victim role that she's a single parent, that she's the one that does everything, that she needed to move to New Hampshire to be near family , which she doesn't even have family there!
when we offer her help with a ton of things she doesn't accept it and then says that we dont help!
She has on numerous occasions when the dad walks away from her to leave a situation she's starting during a drop off she comes over and opens the car door unrightfully!!
she's constantly using the child as a tool, constantly playing the victim , constantly talking to the father like she owns the child. Like he's property!!
She had on one occasion told the father he is not allowed to get his sons hair cut becuase his son is only at our house to play... he is not here for him to be a father. He has no rights to get his hair cut.

And sooooo much more.
How can we prove in court that his ex is controlling and uses her son to get to his father?
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