Is this a reason to break up?

My girlfriend and I went through a torrid two weeks. Over the stupidest of reasons. Another story. But I love her and would go to any extent not to lose her. She was at a baby shower with her girls and I went there with flowers. In the presence of everybody, I professed my love for her. And told her that she was gorgeous and the only girl for me. She is all I ever want. We have a very complicated relationship. Another story. She complains that I never compliment her enough. And say nice things. And understand all her female needs. That I'm never concerned about what she feels. Or whats important to her. I have been by her through everything. I may have missed a trick or two. I admit. Her gripe is that I'm never thoughtful. But here's what I do. She's having a bad day, I leave my office and go to her. With chocolate cake or chocolate anything. Or flowers. Just to hold her and comfort her. I drive to her when the weathers bad. So she doesn't have to drive. And take her to work. She doesn't live or work close to me. Back to the issue. The day after the baby shower, I called her. We spoke ok. Kind of. Then she told me about how she's worried about the pregancy. That she may have post natal depression. And then she shouts asking if I'm listening to her. I told her yes but that is not preoccupying me right now. I'm studying and having a really torrid time. And my health is not good (diabetes). I wasn't rude. But here's my girlfriend telling me about another womans pregnancy. And speculating on top of it. Nothing factual. I also know the pregnant woman. Actually she is my friend for much longer. But works with my girlfriend. They're not even that close friends. But my girlfriend makes everybody's problm hers. And she can do nothing about it. She slams the fone down. Then msgs me telling me how inconsiderate I am. That I never care about whats bothering her. And wants to break up with me because of it. What do I do? l love her and don't want to lose her.
Part of her msg:
Don't don't ever care to find out what is going on with me in my world what are my interests what I like what I don't like. If it's of no interest to u. U don't care to know... like I said what an amazing supportive boyfriend I have that listens to me and my heart and concerned when something is concerning me. I don't even know why I even bothered to try and start having a conversation with u about something that is worrying and bothering me. I know better. I know never to do it
We've been dating for two years now.


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What Girls Said 2

  • Just accept that she wants to break up with you and move on.
    From what you've written here, it sounds like she's got you completely wrapper around her finger. Waiting on her every need as the pleases and your hoping for something more that she simply doesn't feel is the only 'complication' I can see here.

  • At first I thought that it was the misunderstandings between male and females. Women have a hard time accepting that men are different and aren't so emotionally available all the time and it is not mens fault, they are just different than we are. You seem to be doing all of the things to show that you are there for her and care. You can't read her mind and you do what you know to do. Unfortunately women don't think this way and take it personally that you aren't doing EVERYTHING that she "needs" you to do. However, towards the end you completely dismissed something that, true, it was not a fact or happening to her, but it was something that she was concerned about and she wanted to talk about it. It sounds like you just switched the topic to you and your problems. So, in that case you do need to just hear her out. Even if I am speaking to my friends about something bothering me, if they kept just talking about themselves, I would not talk to them anymore.

    • Can't deny that I did switch off. But reason enough to want a break up?
      She makes everything a big deal and I can't keep up. PMS, bad day at the office, don't say anything about her outfit... and and and. It's always something that I'm never understanding of her. She told me that when it matters to her I need to tell her the right things. That she's pretty etc.
      I do this all the time. When she makes the effort to dress up, I tell her she looks good. But its never enough. She expects me to read between the lines all the time. And even told me so that she does. I'm just a normal guy trying his best to make his girlfriend happy. Sometimes I do come up short. Is there anybody who doesnt?

    • Yeah, you do have to try to stop and just hear people out. Sometimes its hard, even with my friends sometimes they talk about stuff I find so boring or about something that I can totally relate to, but I hear them out and try to not just keep talking about "When that happened to me I did " I try to not always talk about myself and hear them out. Otherwise, I am sorry but she sounds sooooo needy and dramatic!! I would not want to keep having to reassure someone or always have someone to tell me I am not doing enough and what I should be doing. That can get so wearing!! She probably won't ever change, so think about if this is what you want forever and maybe figure that out first. And/or tell her that his is life and you will never be perfect and life will never be perfect and to just learn to deal with it or leave.

What Guys Said 1

  • There is way more wrong than her breaking up here dude

    • I'm not a bad person. You mean her?

    • Not you dude , with her

    • I know you care for this girl and you would do most anything to get her back and there in is the problem

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