How to come to terms with myself to end a relationship?

I am having an affair with a so called taken guy. This has been going on for a year. I know its wrong. We have been friends for 2 years prior. He doesn't live with his significant other because of work. She lives in Australia and he lives here. They see each other every 3- 5 years. Its a long time. Its understandable to feel lonely. I never expected us to get to this point. I am on my 2nd year with him. He claims he loves me. & once I thought I had gotten pregnant on accident but it was a false alarm. He was so bummed. I pretend that is what I wanted too. I don't. I am cautious. I can't make plans with a man when has plans. I do love him but I wish that the time was up so he would return home. I am such a wimp. He is a great guy. Its not fair to me like it is to his wife. How can I let go of this? An easier way?Or there is none.


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  • I think I would let go by looking at the circumstance and realize what is happening.

    If I'm reading your statements right, he is a married man who is having an affair. But he is staying with a woman who he never sees instead of truly committing to the one he always sees. Which tells me he probably wants something like a pregnancy to force his wives hand and make her leave him since he seems to have no desire to leave her.

    I don't think you are overly cautious I think you are looking at his actions and are realizing he doesn't look like the most faithful partner. Not to mention the fact that he never sees the woman he is married to but can't seem to leave her for you. Telling someone you love them is great but showing someone is evem better. And staying in a marriage while being with you can only make you feel like the other woman, not the love of his life.

    I hope you do find the strength to break it off with him because you will never have the great relationship you are hoping for. You will always distrust him because he has proven himself untrustworthy.

    And I know you think he is a great guy, but if he was that great, you wouldn't be posting this question.

  • You shoud talk it over with him and tell him you're extremely uncomfortable with the relationship you guys are having now. And then I think you should back out, and if you want, offer that if he ever becomes a single man again, maybe you guys shoud give it another shot. It'll be better to end it now than later if you want when he goes back or you acutally get pregnent.


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