What does my ex truly want?

He will text me consistently for a couple months and most of the conversation is just him asking me how my day was and then other times it's sexual, and sometimes he confides in me about how he is feeling and his depression. Then he'll call me sometimes when he's drunk and tell me how much he still loves and cares about me and never wants to lose me. He always tells me that if I'm still single and he is too in 2 years he will marry me. Then out of the blue he will stop talking to me, and it hurts but I never reach out to him when he does this.

Its been over a year since he broke up with me, and I've never had a chance to get over him because he continued to contact me throughout that time. I feel so mentally exhausted by it all and wish I could just go away by myself to clear my mind and do some soul searching 😢
What does my ex truly want?
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