Should you be friends with your ex or not?

Basically I know we won't work out in the long run because my parents don't like him, he's 23 and hasn't studied/work, he never takes me out and I buy all the groceries and video games and cook for him. But most of all he didn't love me.
He calls after a week asking if we could be friends. I asked r we gna stay that way when u get a new girlfriend and he said no because of the relationship we had. Honestly I was heart broken :( but what's the point if he's going to ditch me for his new girl even when I want to be platonic friends?
So I said don't ever contact me again, I have awesome friends, I need to grow as a person and you're in the way etc. and blocked him on everything
now I don't know if I should've said yes to being friends

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Most Helpful Guy

  • No, you shouldn't be friends with your ex, it's never suggested that you do that. To add to that, it doesn't make any sense also, I mean you don't want to have him in your life as a partner/boyfriend so why would you want to have him as a friend in your life? and that too after you have broken up with him?

    You shouldn't keep any contact with your ex, whatsoever. That's the best way to go about it.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sorry, but it's a typical "boyfriend who dumps girlfriend" request to want to stay friends, it eases the blow of rejection, and it's only for their own selfish reasons. It's all about them, what they want. I have never stayed friends with exes, except for my ex husband, who is also the father of my children. I have told every one of my exes that once we're done, we're done. I don't stick around. And that's for my own sanity and peace of mind. Move on.

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    • Thanks for your comment
      That's so true.. Why endure the pain longer than u have to right

    • Show All
    • No problem! Stay strong girl :)

    • Thank you for MHO.. hope things are going better for you <3

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What Guys Said 13

  • I don't see the point in it to be honest. If you wanted them as a friend then they would have stayed that way. I don't believe in demotions of rank haha. When I pick someone to be my girlfriend it's either that or nothing.

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  • you did the right thing because that kind of relationship is a vicious cycle you want no part of. and im experienced enough to know this.

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  • You shouldn't say yes. My first love and I aren't boyfriend/girlfriend anymore, but we're still great friends today. She just didn't know the meaning of the word "love".

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  • Ex can't be your friend. He/she can't stays in your friend zone its nearly impossible. Maybe fckbud but not friend.

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  • I know it sounds cold and horrible, but it rarely works. :(

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  • I won't do it.

    An ex is an ex for a reason, and I don't want them in my life anymore.

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  • My ex is psyho as hell and tried to stab me once, hell fuking no

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  • Yes if you grew apart, no if it was an abrupt breakup, although there are exceptions.

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  • nope, it hurts too much. donĀ“t do it.

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  • Does it really matter?

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  • Give me ONE reason this makes your life better.

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  • Depends on the ex. If you ended it on good enough terms, then sure.

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  • If I had a girlfriend who was still friends with an ex and she went out with this ex "as friends", I would think they were doing something on the side.

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What Girls Said 22

  • I honestly don't think it's a good idea keeping in contact with an ex. It just complicates future relationships, and brings too much drama

    I don't keep in contact with exes. I just move on from them. Besides, I would view it as disrespectful to a new SO if I remained friends with an ex. Life's meant to be travelled forwards not backwards. I'd rather just put it behind me and look to my future without him in it. That's just me though, everyone is different

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  • in your situation you absolutely did the right thing!! He sounds like a douchebag! Once you fully get over him you won't even want to remember his face. Doesn't sound like you would gain too much by staying friends with him.

    In my opinion exes can be friends in some circumstances. For example if they were good friends before the relationship, it might be possible to go back to that if the break up is for innocent reasons and on good terms (not one person hurting the other by cheating or being an ass). It is also possible for people who share a rich history together, for example if it was a long term relationship and the two had built a little world together, sometimes it's possible to stay friends because of everything they've been through. But only after some time had passed and both of them had gotten over the break up, otherwise things can get messy. Once you can look back on a relationship and smile instead of feel pain, you know you're over it and this is when you know you can see the other person and be their friend. You'll only know if it's worth being their friend once you're done hurting though.

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  • Absolutely not. Once it's over, it's over. Why go back? Move forward. Remaining friends with your ex gives them the false hope that the two of you could be together again! NOPE! Don't fall for the trap. Move on, tell them to move on. Life goes on, there is no backtracking.

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  • I mean. I'm still friends with most of my exes. The only ones I'm not friends with were the guys who just kind of stopped talking to me. It really isn't like I care either way. I prefer to maintain the friendship mainly because I still like these guys, just in a different way. We make much better friends.

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  • Yes you can be friends with an ex if you want to. People make the effort to be on good terms with their ex, it's hard knowing the both of you did romantic things. By saying that I couldn't stay friends with an ex as I would feel it's me trying to linger and grasp upon someone that isn't mine anymore, and I found it tremendously hard to move on and have closure.

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  • That' weird. Even if he's got a girlfriend or not friends are friends. If you think he's an amazing person and worth talking to then go for it but if you think he's gonna affect your life in a negative way after being friends and you're awesome this way then dont.

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  • You are better off without him. I know it hurts now, but it will hurt more if you stay friends with him temporarily and then he ditches you when he gets a new girlfriend. That and I could see him continuing to use you for all of the things you have been providing for him while you were a couple. It is best if you move on.

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  • Being friends with an ex rarely works out. I really don't see the point of why people try to be friends with an ex. It isn't worth it, and it barely works out, trust me. You are are better off just moving on. Always go with your instinct.

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  • No I honestly don't think you should be friends with your ex because if they're not even a good person and didn't care really much about you, then bye, no need to have people in your life like that. There isn't any benefit to it, thats why most couples who break up who doesn't want the other person to not have hard feelings they usually want to be friends but the word friends is used loosely, they probably won't ever really hang out with that person again and or just makes them feel better that you don't "hate" them.

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  • It sounds like you wouldn't be happy with just being friends. Give it space. There are no rules. Later on you may become friends again. Who knows. For now, you need the distance.

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  • No. You're exes for a reason. There's no need to pursue a friendship. Just let it go.

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  • He's probably looking for a friends with benefits situation seeing as its only been a week, and when he finds a new girlfriend it would be wrong to continue a friendship like that especially with an ex. I think how you handled it was good and im glad that you declined his offer as you deserve better then that.

    Its REALLY hard to be 'friends' with someone you've had feelings for in the past and its even harder if you still have feelings for that person. You need to be completely over your ex to have a friendship and this takes time... a lot longer then a week. It also comes down to how and why your relationship ended to determine whether you CAN be friends with an ex... you need to know why you want to be friends with your ex to determine whether you SHOULD. But it is definitely possible... not always recommended.

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  • If he never takes you out, doesn't spend money, and then doesn't love you then he doesn't deserve your time

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  • You shouldn't be friends with someone like that let alone be in a relationship with them. You were right to say "No," to being friends with him.

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  • it isn't worth it, they couldn't value you as a girlfriend why give them satisfaction of a friend

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  • Keep it at no unless you want to be hurt once he has a girlfriend. Better safe than sorry.

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  • Never be friends with an ex. Its an open door to drama to any other relationship you may have.

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  • No that doesn't work well!

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  • Depends on the situation really.

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  • there's no point, it'll only end in heartbreak x

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