I've been on and off with my boyfriend for the past 4 years. He moved to another state after a year & a half of us dating. We broke up for over a year & got back together on December. I went to visit him on the last week of April but before that I downloaded an app for private texting & began to text him saying I was a girl he had met the past summer. The reason I did this was because I was unsure if he would talk to other girls behind my back. (Apparently he doesn't mind doing so but would get bothered if I did) So when I was with him I told him to let me see his phone & showed him the same messages I had sent him (as the other girl) & tried to have him explain why he was texting her... As the other girl, I would text him by being flirtatious & he would respond agreeing to meet up "whenever she came to town" which was "in a few weeks." At first he told me that she was just asking if they could continue texting (he was obviously lying). We kinda fixed that "problem" & he said he wouldn't text her anymore or any girl that was flirting with him in any way or any girl from the time we were not dating. A few weeks have passed & I notice him a little different so I decided to text him as the other girl again. Of course he keeps replying & asking for her snapchat, instagram, Facebook & a pic. She is supposed to be in town this weekend & they're going to "hang out" Saturday night. I know the with this girl nothing is going to happen because it's obviously not her texting him. But it makes me wonder if he talks to anyone else or what would actually happen if this girl were to actually be there one day. Would he really hang out with them behind my back? Even after he promised he would have no type of contact with any other "friend" (as he calls it) of his. I know I'm doing wrong with this but I wanted to see if he would actually keep his promise or not (hurts that he's lying). Specially because he is definitely not ok with me doing the same. Someone please HELP me!
Most Helpful Guy
Well, it's not a good way to test your boyfriend like this, because it shows that you distrust him in some or many ways and that is not a good sign at all. What you are doing is wrong.
However coming back to your testing tactic, yes he does seem to show interest in the other girl ( which is you texting as other girl), so from your test, I would say he has failed your test or is failing your test constantly which is also not a good sign.
The fact that you say he is lying is also not a good sign.0
Most Helpful Girl
He's different because you violated his privacy, once you've done that there's no going back. He hasn't forgiven you and he's still carrying on messaging other girls behind your back. I've made this mistake when I was younger and I quickly learnt never to do it again. It ruins your relationships. If your gut feeling is that he's going to cheat he probably will. Our instincts are more accurate than we give them credit for.
Now you have him lying to your face when you confront him, he still messages them behind your back. You have more than enough evidence to leave him. Do it before he actually does cheat on you which may only be a matter of time. All it's showing him is that you don't value yourself highly enough to not be disrespected in such a way.
This is not going to get any better with you checking his phone or with lying to him to 'catch him'. Leave and don't look back.0