What to do?

My ex loves me- I'm not trying to sound egotistical. We broke up a couple of months ago because I got tired of our long distance relationship. We still talk every day and he's my best friend. I know he's not the one I'm looking for, but I don't want to hurt him. I am also a little reluctant on getting into another relationship because I'm so used to him.

He was my first real relationship.

I've been talking to this guy (sort of accidentally): he seems decent and seems to like me. He's asked me out a couple of times but I haven't responded. I feel like I shouldn't let this pass by but I don't know what to do. I'm sure that my ex and I will stop being friends if I started hanging out with this other guy: I don't want to lose him as a friend...

Ack! I don't know how to deal with this drama. Opinions are much appreciated.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, I'll give you non-biased advice and I'll give you my spin on it. Well, the fact is that you aren't going out with your ex-boyfriend anymore. He had his chance. If you're going to move on to a new guy, he shouldn't suddenly be surprised. He should be expecting it, seeing as he should know by now that you aren't dating anymore.

    Now, to the opinionated advice... I think that you should try something new. I mean, like I said above, your ex-boyfriend got his chance. Now, if you move on, and your ex-boyfriend is offended and doesn't want to be there for you, is he really the kind of person you want around anyway? I mean, I don't mean to be rude or whatever, but I'm trying to be as blunt as possible without being offensive. If he's just going to ignore you and give you the cold shoulder because you're pursuing something that makes you happy, then his agenda has changed from caring for you to making you miserable... and that's not okay.

    Bottom line: "I" think you should at least give the new guy a chance or try something new... But the fact is, it's your choice in the end.


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What Guys Said 1

  • I think you need to be prepared to lose you ex as a potential friend as you move on to other relationships. It might or might not happen. I personally wouldn't want to stay close friends with an ex after we have parted ways. I don't care what anyone says, doing distance relationships are tough. I'm in one now, I love her very much and continue being strong in my relationship with her, but due to lots of different stressors with our lives and distance complexing those stressors, I will never do this kind of relationship again. Don't let your ex hold you back.


What Girls Said 1

  • u have to distinguish the non-verbal communicating you are sending to him by not pursuing this guy if you really do like this guy,(him)being ya ex,and then you need to determine wether or not you have made it clear that you guys are just friends and he has to respect your position if he wants to remain your friend,then question his motives is he ya friend secretly waiting to catch you at a weak vulnerable moment or does he really value your friendship enough to suppress his true feelings and are you keeping him on deck in case things don't work out with another dude


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