When you feel like your life is in turmoil?

hershey1kiss2
I fell in love with an ex fling. We knew each other for about three years but only really saw each other for 2 months. We had always liked each other but she always put things in between us as to why she cannot date such as religion and that she had some health concerns. The brief 2 months we saw each other I asked her if she wanted to be my girlfriend and she said she did not want to put a label on things. She ended things after we see me for about 2 months but I remained supportive as she had some health concerns. A few months after she ended things we were out one night and she betrayed me by going through my phone. She got upset that I was talking to other females. I admit that I was talking to other females while in the hope that she would give us another chance. However if she had three years to finally say yes to me and to commit. Therefore I don't think it's fair the way she cast of me out when she learned that I was talking to other females because what is a man to do when you take 3 years to finally say yes to somebody. We had an amazing friendship which was the reason why my feelings for her grew very strong. I truly believe I do love her. However now she actually has a boyfriend who she has actually committed to. In light of that I decided to going no contact with her. I told her we cannot talk since it would not be fair to her new boyfriend that it would only delay my recovery. She sent me a paragraph which I did not respond to I just ended up blocking her. Now it has been almost 2 months and she is still constantly on my mind constantly wondering if she will ever reach out and if there is a possibility we could ever be together again. I've tried moving on with other women however none of them gives me the feeling and the majority of them judge me due to my height. I don't believe I will ever be happy again. What should I do and what are the chances that in the future she may Reach Out?
When you feel like your life is in turmoil?
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