Boyfriend of 1 year broke up with me because "he is too busy to have a relationship right now"... What do I do because I want him back?

My boyfriend ans I have been dating one year. He is divorced, has two children (whom I haven't met) and he received a promotion at work. He is 44 and I am 35, so I do not expect him to be playing games. We would talk about the future together, about getting married, and having kids. He then recently broke up with me after periods of fights (mostly because I would be on the "pay no mind list") saying, and I "quote", "I can't give you what you want and frankly I have no time for a relationship."... I haven't stopped crying for weeks to the point of becoming physically sick. He also said that "I swear on my kids that I'm not looking to date anyone else, and if I was, we'd work it out." I just can't believe I'd be put on the chopping block so easily after a year. I love him and he said he loves me, but I can't stand to be without him. I would even be willing to see him once a week if need be. How do I get him to want to be with me again?


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What Guys Said 3

  • What he really said is "I don't want you anymore so I'm leaving you" but he's too much of a pussy to be honest. It's over permanently and you will not remain friends even if he's the one that asks or agrees to it. Get on with your life. If he ever comes back it'll only be to use you as a backup plan till someone better comes along

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    • It happens all the time

    • This is brutally honest. The important word in that last sentence is "honest." Do you want us to tell you what you want to hear or do you want us to be honest? If you want honesty, you shouldn't castigate someone just because you disagree with their opinion.

  • 1. You can't make him feel anything. You can't make him do anything. No one has that power in any relationship. Not ever.

    2. He was in a relationship for a year and then told you that he didn't have time for a relationship. Despite your confidence in him, I think he has given you a very thin and obviously false excuse for ending the relationship, perhaps because he is concerned bout how you will react if he tells you the truth. Based on your description of how you have reacted to him so far, his fear seems to be well founded.

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    • since we've been together, he's gotten two raises and a boatload of unfinished home repairs (he's a "do it yourself" kinda guy), but I guess that I'm just making excuses.

  • you dont. you respect what he wants

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    • Should I just give him time and space with the "no contact rule"?

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    • im not promising anything. i dont know him. im just saying, if he wants time away, give it to him. youd want the same, right?

    • I know you're not promising anything. I didn't want space, I guess that's the whole thing. I want him back. Just looking for recon now

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