I am a 23 years old girl and the trends in my past 4-5 relationships remain same.
The trend in each relationship is:
A guy will take interest in me, ask me out etc. We communicate and he seems head over heels in love. Saying ‘I love you’ within 3 to 4 days of contact, followed by ‘I just want to have you’ n ‘my future wife’ etc. I always feel the things are going too fast and the guy comes on TOO STRONG. They would text and call me constantly. They would stay awake for whole night and send me poems (even when I am sleeping).
Their intensity is too much, they start treating me like their princess and etc.
HOWEVER, when I start to get attached. I feel a change in behavior. The guy would stop initiating contact or sending first messages, be busier for me. They still act sweet and interested but their actions seem different. It’s not like that they completely change, but I notice pulling back on their part.
This is when I have usually already got emotional for them. The sudden lack of first messages and calls hurt me so much, that I start fighting. And usually within 3 days, I decide to break things off and block them completely from every possible PLATFORM. Even though they try to act interested and say that they are still committed and don’t want to lose me etc. The drop in frequency of text and calls is enough for me to block them. And I don’t tolerate for more than 3-5 days.
So my typical relationship is
First3 days = A guy shows interest.
First 2 to 3 weeks = The guy is head over heels, madly in love. Commits too soon, takes things too fast etc
After 3 weeks = Sudden drop in frequency of texts and calls, too busy
After that, 1 week = Fights and my tears. I get hurt and finally leave forever.
To Note: I am very pretty and make strong first impressions
This has been a trend in my past few relationships. What am I doing wrong? Those guys were insecure and unstable. Can someone analyze the problem and ways to improve my relationships? I feel so alone
Most Helpful Guy
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Most Helpful Girl
Girl, it is not you!! This happens a lot. My theory is that guys are interested a lot off the bat and then their brains catch up and they freak themselves out or get to know a girl better and realized that maybe they don't have a huge connection with them after all. Girls tend to be more timid at first and once a guy has "wooed" them enough and they feel like they can let their guard down and go for it and this is exactly when the guy realizes he isn't that into it. Also, I think guys can sense when they "got" the girl and the chase is over. Either we become more clingy and text them more, or we are paying more attention to every little thing they do but once guys realize this then they really start thinking, "Uh oh, is this really what I want now that I got it?" I have started playing it as cool as I can for as long as I can. Even when you think you "got" them you still have to play it really cool because they still need a chase and to be kept on their toes. Maybe when they "back" off it isn't for lack of interest, it is just that no one can go on like that forever! They have to work and live life too and maybe they just get more comfortable and trying to move past that stage. Basically I am not sure why it happens, these are my guesses but I do know that it happens ALL the time and it is not just you!0