Can someone try and interpret what my ex said to me while we were breaking up?

We broke up after 3.5 years being engaged. He said he thought we were incompatible. He wants to be alone and doesn't want to see me. He said he doesn't know what he wants anymore and is not sure what will happen with him and says it's not fair to make me wait. He also said he is not trying to get a girlfriend right now and that he just wants to be alone. We've been broken up for a month. Since then he has not tried to contact me. I've called him twice we have talked for 30 mins each time but rejects every chance I suggest to hang out. I texted him later after that conversation the next day and asked him if he thought there was 0 percent chance of getting back together and he said " I think there is zero percent chance." I don't understand what he is going through? I am getting a really good feeling that he is done for good. I'm not sure if it gets clearer than that... From a guys perspective what does this all mean? I've been really depressed about everything... We used to live together. I'm sad and I just feel likely life has backtracked into a crappy state again. I'm 28 and I feel like I've had so many life changes this month it it is way too hard to handle... Why do guys do this? And what's the meaning of all of his alone time and isn't sure what will happen with him?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Woman do the same things to...
    There are many possible reasons. Maybe he is depressed, doesn't like the way his life is right now, maybe he doesn't love you anymore, maybe he loves someone else. difficult to say.
    but beside all your pain you have to admit that it is better to just say, ok that's it than waiting for every, fight all the time or cheat on you. not every relationship last. and engagemenet isn't a garanty for anything

    • I think we argued a lot... It just sucks because you have to work on things. I always felt like we were on a different page sometimes.. I just want to fix it and get back together and be happy again. I just know I can't make someone want the same things as me though... It just sucks so bad. I don't want to see him with someone else one day. It's gonna be too painful. He didn't delete me from his Facebook and he hasn't added any new girls to his Facebook page so I don't think it's another girl yet... Or I guess it still could be.., i don't know. I've been so depressed I decided to go to counseling... I bought a new house too and I'm not even excited about it. I'm even more depressed that he isn't going to be there with me. Like I said I've had too many life changes in May and June. I want to better and as selfish as it is I hope I can move on before him and be happy with someone else so when he gets in another relationship with someone else I'm not devastated

  • Guys usually say what they mean, so try taking it at face value. 0% is 0%. Time to move on.

    • Yeah I'm the one who directly in quotes asked if I had "zero percent" chance. So he copied my text back and "yes I think you have zero percent chance" not that it makes it any better or less. He still answers my calls. Like today. He said he is sad, but he can't predict the future". Not sure what that means.

      This painful... But I hope this is for the best. I hope something better comes out of this for the both of us. I just want to wish him the best and if we can't be together I just hope we will both be equally happy with our lives. I just am feeling like my whole life and plans just got chucked out the window and everything is just a little scattered.

      I don't even need a guy. But I guess I'm acting like it and freaking out about it. It stinks bc i wasn't even sure if I wanted to date him in the beginning, but ended up having a really nice personality...

      I guess I'm rambling. I don't think I'm that bad of a person and I don't think I deserved this.

    • If a guy thinks there isn't a future with you or has fallen out of love with you or you tell him you still want to be with them after they say that they don't... Guys just don't change there feelings. I guess?

      It's like he flipped a switch... And now he views me differently. I don't know anymore. I can't sleep at night... I guess if love were a game he's winning and I feel like I'm loosing someone important to me and there is nothing I can do.

What Girls Said 1

  • He could be depressed, but the fact that he said its 0% chance tells me its something else, or even someone else. Sounds like he's fallen out of love with you or realized he doesn't see a future with you. Or, he may need to get something out of his system and doesn't realize it yet... cold feet. If I were you I would just disappear, no contact and no responding to his. He may realize what he lost later, but if he does the only way he will is by you disappearing... and if he doesn't, well, no contact will allow you to heal properly... it'll be hard though, I know...


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