Need help! Can't get over ex!!

So here's the deal,

I've always had trouble falling in love with guys. I feel used all the time and I don't trust most men. Not to be pretentious but I'm a pretty attractive girl and I'm used to guys dating me for sex or because they want to show off in front of people. I've had a lot of one night stands because it's hard for me to go any further with guys.

Then I met someone. Probably one of the most attractive guys of my college. He had a terrible reputation, kind of like me. And we started dating. He seemed perfect, adorable, respectful, kind.

He refused to have sex with me which meant a lot to me because I'm so used to guys using me for that, and because he had the reputation of sleeping with a lot of women.

He was me. But the guy version.

I fell in love with him. very quickly.

I left because I moved somewhere else. We both knew I'd be better if we didn't stay together because we both like our freedom too much.

I haven't had news from him in over a month. We used to talk regularly but he just stopped texting me. I'm afraid he might have gotten over me. I know he's been having sex with a lot of girls since I left. He hasn't dated anyone else yet. I've dated a couple of guys because I'm trying to get over him.

But nothing seems to work.

What should I do?


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Dear,

    i'm sorry but the best advice I think I can give you is you need to figure out what you want, and when you do tell him. The truth is that a month is a long time and he may not ever plan on talking to you anymore. if that's something you are ok with then you need to figure out how to move on. If your not ok with him being out of your life, then TELL HIM!

    Another thing is that it's ok to miss people, I miss my first girlfriend most every day I don't tell current girlfriends anything, but the time we had together is something I can keep.

    I am sorry that I don't know what you should do, if you need like someone to bounce idea's off of I can help with that.

    Anyway, see you around and good luck.

    -tabris

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    • I'm coming back to my college in three months. We will be in the same class for a semester. Should I talk to him to make sure that we keep in touch? Or should I not say anything and wait for things to come by themselves when I get back in september?

What Girls Said 1

  • You need passion and direction. Guide yourself. Forget your past (don't bury it). Just focus on what's now and what will be. You have to figure out what it is that you love the most. Distance and time will help getting over someone. But tell me.. What happens when everything fades away.. What are you left with? Nothing to love. Nothing to be work your a** off for. Nothing to hold on to. Nothing to put effort in... Nowhere to go in life. What you need.. is a purpose.

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    • I'm not sure I understand your answer. Are you saying I should just forget about him? Or that he's my purpose in life?

    • You should forget about him.. I personally don't believe that anyone should be anyone else's purpose in life.. I'm pretty sure you're a bright, young woman with lots of dreams. Follow them.

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