My boyfriend and I broke up, how do I get him back?

My boyfriend (of 2.5yrs) and I broke up. We both could blame it on a myriad of things. The fact that we had to do long distance after college (although we do visit each other), the issues with him having to deal with his bills form his family, the fighting from missing each other, etc. I miss him so much. He is truly my best friend.

One of the biggest reasons we decided to end it was because after his mom died 3.5 years ago, his family started depending on him. That didn't hit him until he went back home & the whole situation really has pushed him into a depression. He can't pursue his dreams like he wants to and he keeps getting further and further into debt. He told me it's changing him for the worst and he doesn't want me to go through that with him. He told me once he moved out, got on the right track he would come back to me & that he wanted to be sure he was ready for me.

I am truly heart broken & I really do want him back. Over this small period of time of being seperated from each other I've seen the things I need to work on. After college he had to go back to reality of his life being in shambles & I didn't fully grasp the magnitude of the situation.

He feels like its his fault that we ended because of everything that he's been going through. Another problem for him was the fact that he has to live at home and when I come to see him I am in a house full of males (just his dad and brother). He told me he's not in a position to make me 100% comfortable & that bothers him. However, I've never resented him for his issues.

I don't want to rush him & I really do want to be with him. He is the love of my life. In a few months I will be moving back to the same city as him for my job. We had plans to live together once I came back but now we are broken up. How do I get him back? I have been giving him space and not contacting him and I have noticed he checks my snapchats everyday and puts up sad posts. I don't want to hold onto false hope.


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What Guys Said 3

  • Suckle hus penis

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  • It sounds like (and this is going to be harsh) he needs to make a decision... does he chase his dreams or does he do right by his family. I had a similiar (but not as extreme) situation where I just had to tell family members "I still love ya... but you are just gonna have to figure it out without me... I need to go start my life." I still see em on holidays or whatever but I still get the guilt attempts from time to time... sometimes you just need to cut out what's holding you back.

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    • I totally agree. He's said that he was going to stop killing himself for them but they found a way to trap him there. He told me I was the 1 good thing in his life and when we were together (before he moved in with them) we were perfect. I don't know if I should reconnect when I move back into the city where he is or what.

    • You can't save people... they have to save themselves.

    • That's very true. I guess that is why I'm not contacting him so that he can get his life sorted out

  • The king is dead. Long live the king.
    Means get a new one

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