I desperately want this break up, but my boyfriend isn't letting me.

for the past couple of weeks I've been trying to break up with my boyfriend of 8months.

but each time I do so, he just tend to give the effort in manipulating my mind or something. convincing me that I'm simply all so confused with my own emotions and that I still love him (when I strongly believe I don't.)

at the same time, he simply breaks down and cries nonstop for hours and exaggerates the point that without me he is nothing. the fact he'd suicide if I ever leave him.

i feel so... helpless in this situation. no matter how tough or harsh I am towards him. he just tends to chain me up like his very own puppy dog. I want him out of my life! he even quoted that "i swear I'll never give up in trying to win you back even though you were to walk away someday. I'll love you forever. and I need you."

...

its like, I have absolutely no way out of this .

in fact, he's seriously freaking me out!

sigh. any suggestions? :/


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Ok, wow interesting story I must say.

    Ok, as a dating coach, I will give you the best professional advice I give any person going thru a situation like this, here it goes:

    In relationships, men tend to get very attached too soon, this makes them develop needy behaviour and losing their idendities as people. Their girlfriends start to become the center of the their world and their idendities. What happens when you lose a part of ur identity? Well, for starters you THINK ur losing a part of yourself, and nobody want to lose a part of themselves. They act desperate and needy, because they BELIEVE that if they lose that part of themselves, they have no identity anymore.

    It is not ur fault he is acting like this, so do not feel guilty or blamed.

    He is poisoning himself into believing all of this, and he will only get worse if he stays with you.

    He has to learn how to become a man and he has to learn that his identity is something that comes from within, and not from a woman/activity or life objective.

    The sooner you leave him, the sooner you will be HELPING him.

    He will be ok, he is having an identity crysis at the moment, he will not kill himself (and if you do think he will, you simply talk with his parents, and they will take care of it).

    He may say he'll hate you forever, he may try and manipulate you or mentally mess with u, but in the end he will thank you someday for having the strength of leaving him, so he could learn how to be a MAN.

    He will grow to be a more mature and healthy person, he will learn from his mistakes AND he will continue living.

    Remember, his manipulation attempts, are for his own selfish self. He thinks he NEEDS you, in order to survive.

    Do not let this affect you. Talk with his parents about his safety and well being, as it will demonstrate you really do care for him, thus, you will not have to feel guilty.

    There comes a time in everyone's life where they must learn how to grow up and be independent. Unfortunately, sometimes it has to be through relationships.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Break ups don't require mutual agreement. However to an extent manipulation does. You realize he is manipulating you, yet you continue to allow it dear. Just get rid of his presence any and every where you can. Obviously if he goes to the same school or whatnot you can't not go to school. You can however just ignore him and stop taking him back and letting him manipulate you. You aren't happy, and something tells me, if he's acting this way, he's not going to be happy regardless of what you do. Cut him off and be done with it. Once you stop giving him reasons to fight, he'll eventually give up.

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  • Oy.

    What a weirdo wimp... Break up with him again - stand firm and start dating others. At that point, if he continues, you can tell him on no uncertain terms that you have moved on. Get some help from a school counselor or teacher, too - this guy's weird.

    Next time he brings up suicide, simply tell him that's his choice and it won't be on your hands. Because, that's the truth... it would be his choice and NOT your fault.

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What Girls Said 2

  • he is a crepper. tell him your done. if he fights back, and acts all suicidal over you, it isn't your fault. he is just crazy. he needs help. and he may be nice now, but his manipulating your mind now, could lead to physical and sexual abuse later. leave him. and remember that the more he is suicidal over you, the more you need to go.

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  • just break up with him and stop falling for his manipulations. tell him its over with and don't let him play with your mind. be abrupt and final. both parties don't have to agree on a breakup , if 1 person wants out then you get to be out.

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