SOMEBODY WHO UNDERSTANDS RELATIONSHIPS ANSWER THIS. did I do something? Why is he saying this? What does he mean? what do I do?

I've been texting this guy for awhile now & I knew 100% that he cared& liked me a lot. He showed it& proved it. We talked 24/7. one day I went to go see him at a mall for the first time for 30 min. We had a nice time& he said later that he didn't hold my hand because he didn't know if I'd like it & didn't wanna come off too strong. But he did pull me into his lap & kiss me lol. I had to pull away After a few seconds because he surprised me, I grabbed his hand afterward so he wouldn't get the wrong idea. Afterwards, he texted me saying he had fun& to text him when I was done shopping. For some reason, I thought I screwed something up but he kept reassuring me that everything was fine& that he wanted to hang out again. He even asked why I didn't stop by to see him after I was done shopping. I still had anxiety over the whole thing because something just felt off, so the next day I told him that I didn't feel good & that I would talk to him later. He immediately asked"what's wrong?"but I didn't get back to him til later. I said that I just had some anxiety, but I was too scared to tell him that it was about him. After that, he told me he was at work &super stressed. I asked if I was part of the reason and he said no he just needs to think about what he wants. I asked if it was about me & he said "no just in general". he ended up telling me that he was super thankful for me. So I said the same. right after he sent me a paragraph saying how he was Scared to get hurt again (his ex cheated on him and it really messed him up).& that he wasn't emotionally/mentally ready to give 100% & that it wouldn't be fair if I did and he didn't. I said that we weren't even dating & that he's thinking too far ahead. Which he responded with "I guess one of us cared more than the other". I tried to reassure him that I care about him so much&that I'm scared too. He said that I'm the only girl he cares about, that he would do anything for me, the only girl he talks to,& he's torn, etc.
I forgot to say that I told him that I "didn't want to talk to someone that didn't wanna talk to me", and he responded with "who said I didn't wanna talk to you?" In the end, he asked if I was mad and I said "no, just disappointed" and he responded with a sad emoji and that's that.
When I say I know he actually had feelings for me, it's because he told me he wanted to talk to me 24/7, always wanted to listen when I was feeling down, usually texted first, always gave me advice, got jealous of other guys that gave me attention, made efforts to come see me, talked about me in his future, etc


Most Helpful Guy

  • Hey he's lying! You did nothing wrong i could be wrong but feom what i read it sounds like he may have said all of that to get out of seeing you or being anything serious with you based off of you not answering him when he wanted to just my thoughts again i could be wrong but i dont think i am

    • Thanks but what does me not answering him have to do with anything, like did it hurt him or make him rethink everything?

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    • Yeah that makes sense. Thank you again

    • Hey i hope you have a good one and hey you can find better or better yet better can find you👌

Most Helpful Girl

  • He's playing with you. Seriously. You said you wanted talk later, he then says he doesn't know what he wants, then he tries to make you feel bad when you say something reasonable. Lol I can't stand people who like to play games like that.
    You did nothing wrong. He's just immature


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • You kissed him, you're you're "not dating"?

    • Well he kissed me. I didn't know he would lol and we've been talking for a few months and it seemed pretty serious so I'm not sure lol we did act like we were dating I guess, just never made it official

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    • Why do girls date losers?

    • Lmaoo 😂😂😅 I don't know i guess I liked him that much. But he broke my heart. i just don't believe he's fully over me because of what we had, but who knows 🙃

What Girls Said 1

  • I've been through something like this and believe me when I say you do not want to fall for a guy like this. Nothing you did, the guy is afraid of getting close, I would move on because he may not want you after he sorts everything out. If you were the only girl, he would not be torn. For some reason he has decided he no longer wants you, I know this hurts, leave him alone to figure out what he wants. get back out there and find a guy who will want you.

    • But the thing that confuses me is that we were already close. We talked 24/7 and we were getting to know each other super well and I know for a fact he cared about me, I also know for a fact that he isn't talking to any other girls, I'm almost 100% sure of it. When he said he was "torn" it was because he was referring to how much he liked me but it was difficult for him because of these "issues" that he's having. But thank you I appreciate your opinion

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    • Damn 😔 dudes are the most confusing thing on this planet. What sucks is that I still care about him so much

    • Nothing wrong w/still caring about him, just don't let it take over your life. When you start getting close to someone, you start caring about them.

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