What is a good way to respond to a breakup text to make them think about what they just did that isn't hateful?

Though I'm not actually going to do it, in fact, I just accepted it because we weren't seeing each other long at all. I received a text from a girl I was seeing saying that there was a guy that she had gotten close with. Said that if I wanted to be friends she was up for that.

thing is, supposedly, she and I were only seeing each other. In a conversation once we talked about how breaking up over text is wrong. Last time we were together everything was great, in fact, we had been discussing our plans for the next time we got together.

i know the best way to handle it is to just drop it and go on, which is what I'm doing. But, just being curious, I wonder how a person can respond that makes them realize what they just did.


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What Girls Said 2

  • hey there, i like the way you sound, a person with reason and self respect. straight out i agree that there is absolutely no reason for you to bother spending your time creating a meaningful text to this person, they frankly dont deserve your time and consideration and from what youve said i dont think it would make a blind bit of difference to their thinking and behaviour. i would just think on yourself that you are the kinder spirited person here and deserve better and with an outlook like yours it will come... if you really want to pen something, i personally have used this practice myself with an abusive ex, i text myself all the things i want to express and know its better to me than to them because i would be wasting my time and just prolonging an issue that doesn't deserve my time xx BUT again if you really want to send her a message i would still use my recommended tactic and after several messages you would probably find bits in each that would make up a thought provoking text that you could send to her, hope that helps xx

    • Basically I just think it over, and just write things out, never sending them. Helps a little, treat it like I would really send it and wouldn't want it to be hateful. Can't lie, still care for her so anger comes and goes along with other stages after a breakup. I figure trying to be friends is a bad idea, I was never in it for that anyway

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    • Exactly, I've always believed suggesting being friends was just a way for someone to feel less guilty about breaking up. Yes, being around a girl with her new boyfriend is a very awkward situation if you still care for her. Besides that, just dropping out of sight, I would figure they would realize what they gave up

    • i would have to say there are exceptions to your opinion, my first husband i knew from 11 years old and so we had a lifetime friendship and we did finish on mutual understanding. after a year i got together with a childhood friend of his who i had also known since 13, had my children with him and we all stayed great friends by choice none of us wanted to lose what we had, sounds crazy to most people but we lived in two houses sharing before i had the children, looking back though, i can appreciate there was definitely something that being around eachother provided for each of us, like a weaning off, a sense of security, i sometimes felt emotion of still caring about him and as he was also a great friend like him around. now i think honestly the childrens dad went with it but underneath it probably caused issues. would you agree that in a more general sense if a man goes along with the friends suggestion he is more than likely holding hope for reuniting?

  • Silence is a good response


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