The Inevitable End?

It is so hard for me to take my relationship seriously without thinking about the ending. I'm falling in love with my new boyfriend and I'm so scared to let myself because it has been so long since I have felt this way and I never want to feel loss with him.
How do I change my mindset? I'm literally getting nightmares about how the relationship could end in the future.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Aw man!! Kgg I feel for you. It's very hard dealing with love mate. It's the best damn feeeling in the world but it's twin, extreme emotional pain lingers just right around the corner.

    There is no set way to change your mindset really. In all honestly, to me, love is just risk, not knowing what you're getting yourself into or what will happen in the future. You give your heart over to your partner and trust that they won't bring your nightmares into reality by crushing it.

    That's what love is.. it's having no control, being powerless
    - forget who said it but yeah lol🤓

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Most Helpful Girl

  • "Keep things at arm's length... If you let anything come too near you want to hold on to it. And there is nothing a man can hold on to" - I still have same problem.
    Just now I try to risk more than I did before, cause life is too short for being a coward.
    Do not think about its end, but think about those beautiful moments that you will share with each other.
    Live for a moment, stop worrying about future, nothing is endless and that's a beauty of life.
    Try yours, If you do not fight just because you are afraid of lose, you'll be more than a loser.
    I made same mistake once and every time when I look back I think "What if"...
    Enjoy your life now, we have no time for fears, cause we may not be alive tomorrow.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 7

  • "I'm so scared to let myself because it has been so long since I have felt this way and I never want to feel loss with him."

    Well, lets say we talk about longest time it could have been, 17 years is not that long if we count in that up to 14 you probably had no romantic interests, so it could be 3 years which is nothing...

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  • What you're doing is called "setting yourself up for failure" which will make it inevitably end in failure

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  • You could take things a little bit slower, let the new feelings sink in so you become used to them. Focus on the now and enjoy yourself.

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  • The best way I would say to attempt this and alleviate your fear is to focus on maybe avoid the common relationship ending pitfalls like lack of communication/lying etc. Other than that in the end it's really sort of a gamble we all make when we open up our hearts to someone. I'm from NYC and we have probably one of the worst dating scenes so I tend to think on the negative side of the dating scale. Like you once things gets really good all I can think about and wait for is the end.

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  • It will most likely end thats why your feeling this way. The odds are against you.

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  • Ejoy it while it lasts. More than likely you'll go to college and move on. You'll get over it quickly.

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  • everything ends at some point, enjoy it while it lasts

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What Girls Said 6

  • The more you think "negatively" the more it would put pressure on the relationship. It's already guarding you in certain aspects and you won't be able to fully open up to your boyfriend when the time comes. Receiving reassurance from your boyfriend is a good idea, you may need to talk to him. Being vulnerable is ok when it comes to situations like this. The relationship won't bloom if you're not willing to give it 100%

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  • just tell him how you feel lol
    I swear letting people into your head just takes the load away especially if he s concerned.
    see how he reacts to your inquiry

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  • Enjoy living in the present. Stop worrying about the future. You can deal with whatever happens when it happens but worrying will do nothing for you and will hurt your relationship. Just relax and enjoy your boyfriend. You will be so much happier

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  • How long have you been together? it's normal to feel that way at the start but as you settle in, you start to feel comfortable and secure.

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  • You can't predict the future, so just grab him and enjoy it. If you both love eachother, let eachother into eachother's hearts and see from there. (I should become a poet)

    Also... If your insecurity about losing him keeps happening... it's going to come true eventually, you'll succesfully push him away

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  • Don't fall in love or accept that you are giving yourself through trust and you trust him to not destroy you.

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