Please read, not sure what I'm asking here? I just need help?

Recently my ex and I completely stopped talking. Within the time that we dated I was going through a lot of changes, quitting my job, looking for a new one, moving out of my parents house to a new area, etc. After we broke up I realized how manipulative and emotionally abusive he is. he'd tell me all the time how annoying I was, 90% of time it was just me joking with him he was allowed to dish it out but he couldn't take it, he'd tell me constantly how awkward I am which i never thought I was awkward so now I feel like everything I do is awkward even when my family and friends tell me I'm not. I'm not much of a sexual person I know with sex I can get a bit weird and I told him my insecurities with it and that I'm still not fully comfortable with it and he'd just push it off and say how I'm being stupid and sex is just sex blah blah. Which he was the only person I have ever had sex with it takes time for me to be comfortable with it. He told me that I will always be awkward with anyone I'm with and he makes me feel like he was the best thing that ever happened to me and he's the only one who would be able to put up with me. I know it's not true. I know there is someone who will love me for me but he's still in my head. I still believe him.

Everyone tells me to get over him and never get involved with him because I deserve someone better. As much as I want to hate him I can't. I know he is manipulative but I still want to be with him I still love him a lot. He means so much to me and I hate it! If he were to ask me right now to come over I would. He would make me seem like I was mental and that I'm going crazy and now I feel like I'm actually going crazy. I'm not even sure what I'm asking here. I just don't know to what to do. I know I'm stupid for wanting to be with him. I want to forget him but it's not that easy. Since I moved I don't have anyone to talk to except for my roommate and she's always out with her boyfriend and it makes me feel worse about my situation.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Your friends are right, there is someone else better out there for you. You think your ex is the right guy simply because you haven't met or dated anyone else that does treat you right. You need to stop focusing on him. You cut all ties with him. Destroy and delete any connection with him, block him from social media. Now you regroup and start to find new friends and new relationships. Stop hiding in your room. You need to go out and meet people. Join some groups or sports. This doesn't happen over night. It will take time. Be patient!


What Girls Said 2

  • Do yourself a favour and dump this guy.

    I know love is a poweful feeling but what is it.. if all he does is drag you down, insult you, undermine you, and basically dont do anything to help you up? Why stay? Do you really want to see yourself with a guy like that in the future? If he is like this now, who is to say he would change and then the kind of husband or father he would make? love yourself and do good for you.

    • I don't want to but my thoughts and everything is always about him. I can't stop thinking about him and how much I miss him. I miss talking on the phone with him for hours and hours, I miss driving around with him. I know he isn't worth it but he made me like he was the only one who would ever like me. I wanted to be the one that was able to make him settle down and not be his abusive manipulative self. I want to make him a better person. I just don't want him to treat anyone else the way he treated me and the girls of his past. I'm so mad at myself for ever believing him.

    • Show All
    • Not at all, my roommate is my best friend and the only person in this area I know and all she does it talk about her boyfriend or if I say something she's on yeah my boyfriend likes that. I talked to her before and told her I don't want to talk about relationships and her boyfriend right now because of everything that has been going on. I told her I'm happy for you but I can't talk about it. The whole time I had a boyfriend she did nothing but give me so much hate for hanging out with him to the point that I would stay at his place every night because she had so much beef but I don't do that to her with her boyfriend. I try my hardest to be happy for her but her relationship just makes me think of my old one and it makes me feel worse. I already talked to my mom about this because I just been so depressed about everything so she mad me go to home for the weekend and i over heard her crying because i've been so depressed it makes her sad and I don't want her to worry even more about me.

    • @Asker, k, I understand. Just give it time. Seriously tho, you need to spend time away from roomie and enjoy yourself. This is breaking you down, thank God for mom.

  • At some point, we had the same boyfriend's attitude. Mine was a hundred percent freak controller. He always had my fb account, he doesn't want me to talk to anyone. When he's mad, he always yell at me, tells bad words and it really hurts me emotionally. But yesterday, he broke up with me, his reason was, he's not sure about his feelings anymore. And so i let him go. I never asked for him to stay. You, i, we deserve a loving boyfriend. Let's just wait for him to come in our life soon. Cheer up girl! You're not alone. :)


Recommended myTakes