How to get over an abusive relationship?

I split up with my ex last May and I can't stop thinking of everything he put me through. He took my money to buy alcohol and drugs then would dissapear with his friends. I'd be fuming and he would minipulate my mind so much I'd believe it was my fault. In the end his drugged up party life got so out of hand it ended up with me being punched in the face, strangled on the sofa and smothered with a pillow... because I pissed him off. I split and felt like my life was coming together again... until he got back in contact with me and made my heart so sad for him I gave him another chance last November and on bonfire night I was put in head lock and was strangled yet again. I know I'm so stupid but he has a massive manipulating hold over me and I'm depressed. I've tried being in a relationship with a really nice young man and couldn't shake the feeling that if he saw me he'd just kill me so I split with him and locked myself away just ignoring ever bodies messages and declining nights out. I'm going to the doctors for help in the morning because I'm distraught and baisically fucked in the head because of it. How do I cut all ties without living in fear? I have strong panick attacks around 5 times a day and I'm hopefully getting a new job soon so I need to sort my life out

I've literally had to join an online community for help cause I'm sick of living like this it's taking over my life


Most Helpful Guy

  • think of him like a dirty pad.. you wouldn't reuse a dirty pad or tampon, they are toxic, dirty and nasty and will make you sick, possibly kill you. yet those pads/tampons are a necessity just like the need to feel wanted, needed and loved. he was that type of pad/tampon that was your favorite but they discontinued it and you can't get it anymore so you tried reinserting him and got a reminder why you don't do that. throw him in the trash, don't stick him on a wall or on the mirror or on the stall door, definitely don't flush him again though. it sounds like you tried to flush him and everything just backed up and overflowed. throw him and his memory in the disposal unit meant for people like him. those memories never spoken about because they make you feel dirty, or are just too nasty. nothing to be afraid of because ultimately you are the one in control and he knows that. thus the physical abuse, he was attempting to show you he had the control when he knew that you really had it he just scared you off of using it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Why haven't you gone to the police? Even if it's just for a restraining order.
    And you need to move on, force yourself to go out more etc.

    • I honesty try to go out. I tried to go out at the weekend and had a massive panick attack and fainted. I hate that it's got this far it's ridiculous. I just want to go out like I used to until 5am with no worries

    • :/ you need to see a doctor and then just take baby steps

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What Guys Said 2

  • 1. Talk to the cops.
    2. Social programs should allow you a house and temporary money.

    • I don't have any evidence. They said I needed visual evidence if I was to persue him. I have no scars or bruises or anything over text or anything

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    • I did he was having an episode and I fled and came back the next day with my mum for my things and I've been made to feel so worthless its unready

    • You got to be strong, take a few days or weeks off. Get into a club or a better relanship.

  • I just get away before he goes bananas..


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