My boyfriend was telling me about his ex (after I asked how many serious relationships he has actually been in. Even though it wasn't really serious. It was a fling) My boyfriend said his ex had everything he could ever want in a woman but she did some pretty awful things to him. That hurt me but I ignored it. I brought it up about a week later (cause she called him and I was acting nervous) and he told me 'I THOUGHT she had everything I wanted but I was wrong. You've had her beat from day one." He says she was a bitch to him but they are still good friends. Every guy I've known that is still friends with an ex (especially one that he obviously has some animosity towards) isn't totally over her. He told me last night that he stopped talking to her for me. I NEVER asked him to do that. But he said he felt like he had to because I admitted I was jealous (which was being honest. You have to be honest about how you feel). Then he said 'she's probably p*ssed off and wondering what's wrong' and he started to cry. I said 'wow you do still love her don't you?' and he got up and told me to 'get the f*** out' and walked away. I told him to stop and if he didn't really love her to come back to me that instant. He stared at me for a second, looked away and then walked over to me and hugged me and said 'I don't love her anymore'. But is that the truth... I don't know. I've been cheated on and/or left for an ex a few times before and I don't want it to happen again. I know she has a boyfriend but WHAT IF? What if they break up and she wants my boyfriend back? We've only been together for a few weeks but we've connection so strongly in this short time. I feel like I can be completely honest with him, which is why I told him his ex makes me nervous and I don't want to lose him. Most guys I would just ignore it.
Is he over his ex?
What Guys Said 1
In a nutshell NO he's not over his ex, she still has her grips on him and its clear part of him still wants the emotional connection to her becouse he hasn't cut her off yet. its good that your intuition is telling you that there's a problem and your not just ignoring it, so many people try to rationalise there intuition and this only leads to more pain down the road.
you need to be carefull with this guy becouse that little emotional outburst..you know the whole crying and "get the F**K out" is a sign he has little self control and its not fair that he directed it at you, what this tells me and should tell you is that he will take his exes consideration over yours.
what this man needs to do is grow up and cut his ex off. whilst she is in his life your going to be dating an emotional train wreck that could spark of in your direction at any moment.
Now how much pain you can take through this is up to you, but unless he makes a concious effort to do what I said he needs to do in the next 2 weeks I would sugest looking else ware for a partner.
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