How I could break up with my boyfriend without hurting him?

I wanna break up with him but I dont want to hurt his feelings at all
break up is the best thing for us because we have very different views
and we fight every day but he always say sorry


Most Helpful Guy

  • Great question! I know it’s easy to get trapped in thoughts about what will happen when we break the bad news to somebody.

    However, it’s easy to see he’s not happy either. It sounds like he is being argumentative and then regretting it and that this repeats over and over. Now, of course you play a part in the arguments as well given that you choose to participate in them, but if you feel a lot of negativity around this relationship, it may be time to end it.

    I would recommend doing a bit of work on yourself before leaving however. You might get a lot of benefit from really rooting out any negative thoughts you have about him, before finally deciding. The reason is that frequently, when we leave a situation because of negative experiences, the negative thoughts we have around it, cause us to attract a very similar relationship quickly.

    Don’t you know people who seem to be dating the same person over and over? And it’s a different person but it might as well be the same one because they end up with the same problems over and over?

    This won’t happen if you really reach a place where you can look at him with love and be thinking about why you got together in the first place and not have any negative emotions around him. Stop entering into arguments and just keep thinking about when you guys were happy.

    When you are pretty stable in this state of mind and no longer get angry or upset, then if you leave, you’ll not only have an easy time breaking up; you’ll also be able to move on very quickly.

    Does this make any sense to you? I hope it provides a bit of perspective.
    Best of luck.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Break ups are never easy and yes they are hurtful either to some extent or to a large extent. One way you can make it less hurtful for him is by telling him that you are taking a break and then eventually distance yourself from him which will eventually lead to break up.

    That way it would be less hurtful but even that will hurt to some extent at least.

  • Say to him look we are always arguing this has caused me
    to have stress pains all through my body and it's making me
    feel really bad my doctor recommended we are best to break
    things off and you could say it's doctor recommended.


What Girls Said 4

  • Breaks up hurt. There's no way around it. If you are afraid he will cry and beg, then I would either do it over phone or over email. I feel over email you can outline your reasons, but I hear guys will call you a biatch forever if you take that route, so like call him first and tell him you need to talk and that you feel this is the best for YOU and send him the letter and hang up.

  • Well, think of the WHY, and focus on that.
    If you're reasons are (such as), you're of this religion and he's of that and you find it difficult to be with him for those reasons. Or you want kids and he doesn't. You focus on that and make it clear it's not about his personality, and that you care for him, but these differences are not things you want.

    But you mention fighting? Well focus again on the WHY you're fighting and just say how you think you'll BOTH be happier in the long run.

    But if he loves or cares for you, no matter what reason you give, it will hurt and you just have to accept that. Accept he'll fight you for it. Accept that he'll plead and try and make promises to be better etc. And he may not, he may agree, doesn't mean it won't hurt.

    But also take responsibility yourself, know that the fights could be at your fault also, and don't put things onto him or make him feel guilty etc.

    But you just have to know what you want and think of yourself.

  • You're gonna hurt him anyway so just break up with him

  • Just tell him gently


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