Is it OK for my boyfriend to keep in contact with his ex because they have dogs together?

OK I love dogs...But they are not kids. So... My boyfriend, when we first started dating, made his ex sound like a beast. He travels for work so I asked who takes care of the dogs when he works and he said his mom does. We went out for a year and things were GREAT. Then I moved in with him 3000 miles away from my family and friends because the long distance was getting old. When I moved there in OUR house...Mind you a brand new place... I found pictures of her, cards he kept for the last 4 years, and he even called me her name...Ugh. I found out they went to dinner while I was living in my home town and he said it was just because he picked up the dogs and was trying to be nice...Um how about thinking of being nice to me? Anyway, they meet up in various places and exchange one of the two dogs that they have so they can both see them. He usually does this when I am at work. One time she picked them up from our parking lot and he combed his hair and brushed his teeth before he went downstairs. It made me want to cry that he cared what he looked like after he sat looking the way he did with me all day. Am I simply being to weird about this or is he still not over her? They dated for 8 years and have been broken up for four years but in the past four years went on vacations together and he even lived with her...I need to know if I should let it go or if he's simply not over her, even though he says he is.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • There's nothing wrong with him having joint custody of some dogs with his ex. However, he needs to be respectful of you and your feelings, by including you in the interaction. If I were in his position, I'd feel an obligation to invite you along with me, anytime I was planning on spending any time (no matter how insignficant) with my ex. Love ALWAYS protects.

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What Guys Said 1

  • He still cares about her. He doesn't care enough about your feelings. Simple as that.

    The whole dog business is fine but the things he does with his ex for the last few years and now the meetings while your not there ect...those are not signs he cares much for you.

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What Girls Said 1

  • i don't think people should treat dogs like children. if so, the dogs would be fully grown and able to decide who to live with or better yet, go out and get a job and place of their own lol. sure you get attached to pets but in order to make a clean break you have to decide who gets the pets. personally, I want to be with someone who doesn't care what I look like in the morning so I don't think you should be putting too much importance on his brushing his hair and teeth. you're the only one who can decide if you can live with this arrangement if he insists on things staying this way.

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