Still upset about a breakup? It's been 4 months?

He was the first guy who ever had feelings for me. I was head-over-heels in love with him. We dated for a year and a half, and then he broke up with me. It's been 4 months, and I still feel really lonely, anxious, and sad. Sometimes I'm angry at myself, and I blame myself for the breakup, and other times I resent and blame him. And sometimes, after 4 months, I still find myself crying over him.
I feel lonely all the time because I really miss him, and I worry that I will never meet anyone like him again, especially since I go to a women's college, so it's more difficult to meet guys. I don't know what to do. Is it normal to still feel this upset after 4 months? Or is that too long to still be upset? Is it typical to be this anxious about trying to find someone new?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Im four months into the break up now. Had to deal with going past the anniversary, his birthday and next is my birthday in two weeks.

    He was in a rebound after a week after five good years together, and he is still in that rebound. I have a strong career and we were buying a house at the time. She has no job, a council flat, a 5 year old child and is 5 years younger than him. He is now 28 and I'm nearly 27.

    Break ups are hard and I still don't get how he can jump into someone else's knickers so quickly when we were so strong. The rebound pain is worse than the break up as I thought we would get through it. I thought he was just scared of the house commitment...

    • I feel the same way. My ex has a new girlfriend himself (who tbh is very immature and rather unfortunate looking). How can they just move on?

    • Show All
    • He broke up with me for this other girl. So he was most likely seeing her beforehand. Not sure how long he'd had feelings for her while keeping me around, though.

    • My guy was in a depressed state due to job issues and didn't know what he wanted he was a genuine mess. I do think mine met the girl since and it was the first girl that appeared rather than one who has been around a while. If he did meet her before then he really is an idiot lol.

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What Girls Said 1

  • You're still grieving. It will pass.

    • But is it normal for a person to grieve for this long? Is there a way to speed up the process, or do I just have to live with the grief until it finally passes on its own?

    • I had to grieve over a friend I had did things with for 7 months. I thought we would be together, but he kept avoiding me and dating other girls behind my back; cut me out of any contact. I cried less over the months, but it would hit me at random times. It will pass, though.

    • So live it off; if you gotta cry then you cry. Don't hold it in.

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