Is this cheating?

I have a boyfriend of many years, but last night I cuddled with my best guy friend because he asked me to. He is dealing with a really bad break up and we are really close. He asked me to cuddle with him for "therapy". We hugged in the bed face to face and he stroked my hair, and then we spooned as well. He also kissed me on the forehead once. He's also mentioned many times before that he feels attracted to me and that if I ever broke up with my boyfriend he knows we would be together. I have told him every single time that it would be out of the question.

I do also tell him that I am having problems with my boyfriend recently. When we were cuddling I did not feel any attraction towards him but I know that he did because he told me that I'm "hot" ...but that he respects me.

I honestly felt no attraction towards him and only did it because he said it would comfort him.

However I can't shake the guilty feeling and haven't slept the entire night. Did I cheat on my boyfriend? I love my boyfriend very much.

thank you!


Most Helpful Guy

  • You did it out of sympathy and you feel guilty. I don't think it's "cheating but yes, it is dodgy. Explain to him that this is not going to continue, that you are gaithful and dedicated to your boyfriend and as much as you want to be there for him, there is a line you are not going to. cross.

    Here is one "Get out of jail free"-card.

    Use it. But remember to change things.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • if you never do it again you did not cheat on him,

    if it ever happens again then you already have cheated on him..

    your choice

    • Why is it that this time was not considered cheating? Thanks!

    • Show All
    • That's a good point. If you do it again realizing that it was a mistake then it would be a case of cheating. This is another case where you can't make everybody happy so giving in to spooning with him because it would make him "feel" better wasn't the best idea but now you know to not do it again. Move on, you'll be fine.


    • Hi thanks so much guys~

      but if your girlfriend told you this...would you ever forgive her or trust her again?

      I like to be honest and tell my boyfriend everything because I have skin thin as paper =X I can't hide or lie about anything...

  • Not so much cheating, but it's really dodgy none the less. Sure hugging your friend be it male or female is fine, but that is a bit much.

  • looks like your best guy friend wanted to get laid :P

  • its simple, will he be ok if he knows ?

    • Thanks for answering. I want to tell him, but I am afraid that if I do...he will never forgive me? I really felt no attraction whatsoever, and I plan to marry my bf. Do you think it's worth it to bring it up?

    • Nope,,, don't tel him,,, and never do anything to any friend just because they asked ?

What Girls Said 2

  • ABSOLUTELY NOT! You didn't cheat. However, I wouldn't feel the need to tell your boyfriend because it meant nothing so don't make it something. But also, you did it once, as a friend, so brownie points for that... but to do it again?... I would discourage as your friend may be transferring his affectioin to you to replace the affection he had for his ex. And if he does think your hot, your just opening a can of worms. Don't encourage him to like you cause clearly you don't. He is also feeling vulnerable. Girls are nurturing so I can see you were just trying to help but next time just stick to be a listening ear and maybe a friendly hug. Hugs are okay, the spooning and cuddling... well you probably didn't realize at first he would get really cuddly etc. and he kinda put you in a bad situation because he is feeling low and lonely. Don't be one of those girls that feels the need to tell their boyfriends EVERYTHING, trust me.. you were there, you know the score, you know what happened the boyfriend may read into it more and again... you didn't do anything so don't make it something.

    I hope you take this advice, trust me, I've made the mystake saying things I regretted opening my mouth later. As the saying goes "let sleeping dogs lay"

  • dont know if its considered as cheating I guess it depends how your boyfriend thinks but you should never do anything you cannot tell your boyfriend if you say you're in a serious relationship.


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