I split up with my ex 3 months ago. We were together 3 years and lived together for the last year. Things weren't great towards the end and neither of us were very happy. I started to withdraw and push her away, although she was the one who finally ended it. She was very angry at the time and we didn't speak at all for a month. I did make some effort to reconcile after that because I have learnt and grown and recognise the mistakes I made. But her behaviour was very erratic. After a while I stopped trying and contact has been very minimal in the last month or so.
Anyway... she is doing an Open Unversity course and her books got sent to my address. This was about 2 months ago and I told her about it straight away. She said she would collect them but never did. Then, about 3 weeks ago, she called saying she needed the books. I was very busy that week so I told her it wasn't very convenient. The next day she text me again to say she needed them ASAP. I replied that I was busy every night that week, but then called her to try and sort something out, and she completely lost it. Shouting that I was playing games, that I was lying about being busy, holding her stuff to ransom, all sorts of rubbish. I said I didn't realise it was so urgent, considering they've been here for 2 months already, but told her that she could come and get them the next day before I went out. The next day I heard nothing. Then a few days later she sent a text apologising for how she had spoken to me. I replied saying not to worry. A few days after that I got another message saying she needed them. Again I said she could get them the next day. Again I heard nothing. A week later she called me again but this time I didn't pick up. She didn't leave a message and didn't call again. This was 4 days ago. Why is she calling once a week to say she needs her things but then make no effort to actually get them? Especially when it was apparently so urgent 3 weeks ago? It doesn't make any sense to me at all.
Most Helpful Girl
Have you opened them? If not let her know you'll be returning to sender and she'll need to contact them for a refund or replacement. This isn't your problem, you've given her a reasonable time frame and she didn't bother showing up.
It sounds like some serious games are being played though, was she always that erratic?1
- Show AllShow Less
Most Helpful Guy
To me it kinda sounds like she might still want to be with you. She knows if she goes and gets the books that she won't have any type of excuse to come see you. Also have you heard of indifference? She's showing negative emotions meaning she still cares about you in some way. I feel as if you care about her as well considering why else would you have to ask this? Just to know why she won't come get her books? Comeon now. Giving someone time away from you. Aka deleting from social medias etc. Makes things easier in a sense of time heals all wounds.1