What does he want from me?

bumblebee88
My boyfriend (30) and I (28) broke up about 4 months ago due to commitment issues on his side. We were together for a year and a half, which was happy times 80 % of the times but the other 20% he always left me wondering where our relationship was going. We did long distance for a while which we made work and making efforts from both sides ( More from my side than from his, his efforts was after I had gotten sad or mad that he didn't care to visit. He also seemed to reply on my messages when he felt like it, and when I asked him why I barely seem to hear from him over weekends he would ask me why I'm so needy.). We ended up breaking up due to the fact that he decided to take a job even further away, without offering a solution / considering me and my feelings and saying : "You can look for a job there if you want, but you are doing it at own risk. I can't promise you that it will work out. What If another 5 years go by and I'm still not ready for marriage?"
Strange thing is, even though I know what you're going to tell me I am still heartbroken, I still miss him, I still try to fix things after being pushed away numerous times. And I do this because I love him with my whole heart, I also adore his family. I asked him about a week ago how he felt about us at the moment, and about me and he said that I should know the answer due to the fact that I am the only one he has ever taken home to meet his family. I am extremely confused, hurt and I honestly don't know how much more of this I can take. I'm fighting a losing battle alone.
I really need advice from a guy's perspective. At this stage I am also considering going cold turkey, deactivating my Facebook for a while to heal without seeing his pictures, posts or just anything which can lead to overthinking. Would this be childish?

What does he want from me?
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