Should I try get back with my ex?

My ex broke up with me because she wasn't ready for a serious relationship.

(This wasn't the first time this girl struck me down. I asked her out last year and she said she wasn't looking for a relationship and this year she came to me looking for one. She never dated anyone before me so I'm not sure if she's just scared.)

She said she still had feelings for me when I talked to her to get some closure but she said she's trying to get over that. We decided to give ourselves some space before we try to be friends again.

It's been 3 months since that break up. I got over our relationship and started doing my normal things. We hang out with the same people so we see each other a lot. We casually talk and I would even consider her my friend.

Though I have to admit that I fell for her again. Though this girl may not know it, I improved a lot about myself just to impress her and try to get her to like me. It worked, obviously. She means a lot to me. I ran out in 30 degree weather only in a t-shirt and jeans to see what went wrong here.

I'm honestly considering to start flirting with her again and seeing how she feels but ultimately I want to get back with her in the most effective way. Any tips?


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What Girls Said 2

  • yea because I once was in her shoes. sometimes girls aren't ready for a relationship (especially when they are young) , they might feel nervous because it is a new thing that is happening in their lives, or probably they got heart broke. give her a chance!:) good luck

    • Yeah, I made a rookie mistake by telling her I love her. She didn't say it back and she freaked out the whole night. She called me and I told her I didn't mean it that way, etc. 5 days later we broke up /: I guess that made her nervous because we were totally fine before that.

      So yeah, I'll try to take it slow and not make her as stressed.

      Thanks anyways!

  • I'd say you probably know more about what this girl wants since you used to date her than any of us online that don't know you or her or the previous relationship.

    People mature with age, and it sounds like both of you have matured quite a bit since you broke up. I'd say the best thing would be to start over. Don't go back into the relationship as if you hadn't broken up at all. Act like you're getting to know each other again because if you've changed as much as you have, she's probably changed a great deal to, and you'll need to get to know the new people you've become. Maybe she has matured enough to want a real relationship, this is a big step.

    Just take it slowly and treat her the way you know she's always wanted to be treated. Don't try to overimpress her or you'll come off as desperate and trying too hard. If you care about her as much as it sounds like you do, then you two shouldn't have any problem getting back together.


What Guys Said 1

  • Well, you can certainly try, but I don't think 3 months is long enough for her yet. If you try too soon it may back fire since she isn't ready yet and may actually get mad at you for not respecting her wishes. Remember, you're the one who has fallen for her again, not her falling for you. So she may not feel the same way right now. You don't want to push her away.


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