Will he see this as a desperate move?

I just heared my ex will be attending my birthday party this Christmas at his cousins house. There is no other day to celebrate it (due work) and his cousin suggested to celebrate it at his house. I agreed because I thought my ex wouldn't be able to make it due work. We are not related by blood. But we do share the same family through marriage.. his brother is married to my sisters sister in law..

I am still not over him (he is my first love), and since it is my birthday I don't want to feel awkward or sad... I haven't seen him since our break up. No one knows we had a long distance relationship.. He lives in the UK and me in France. I am not sure about this, but since it really bothers me. I was wondering if it is stupid/selfish/desperate to ask him through a text message not to come? Will I lose face, when he knows I'm not moved on yet? He has moved on with his ex-girlfriend, and his girlfriend will be there since she is friends with his cousin.. (he cheated on me, denied it, I broke up and he moved on with his ex)
It's a messed up situation.. and I am not ready to see him yet or with her.. It's mostly his family that will be attending, whom he hasn't seen a year.. I don't want to be a selfish bitch that keeps him from spending time from his family during Christmas.. but I'm still not over him.. and I don't know what to do.

Tips/advice/opions on this matter are all welcome,



Most Helpful Girl

  • I'd ask him not to come. There is no reason he can't go out for one night instead of being there, a night held in your honour.

    All of the family connections are very odd though haha. Hope you have a lovey birthday honey

    • Thank you! Yes it is indeed odd. I met him at a family party. Didn't know his connection untill later on. But never will I ever begin something with someone who is related to my family, or at least think twice about it. Since we will always bump in to one another. Thank you :)

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What Girls Said 2

  • Move on darling. You deserve someone you're not related to AND someone who wants to be with you.

    • I know. But it's hard, cause it was my first time falling in love, and he made me dream about the future.. that he wanted to marry.. so it's hard. But I will eventually.

    • Thanks for your reply by the way :)

    • You can do it!

  • I mean, you can ask, but it's your cousin's house and so they technically are the one you have to ask first.

    Why does he want to go anyway?

    • He will be there to celebrate Christmas with his family.. he knows I will be there. But he doesn't know we will celebrate my birthday aswell.

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