Opinion on No Contact. How long/ will it work?

My girlfriend of 3 years and I broke up 2 months ago. She went from saying she wanted it to work and she loves me but need time to focus on her and school. Well I begged for 2 months and I think I pushed her away. She now says she doesn't know the future but she doesn't think she will want to be with me. She is asking for space now and says she is still here if I need her, but 99% of the time ignores me. I haven' t talked to her for 5 days and I plan on waiting at least 3 more weeks. My question is what length of no contact is the best? Could she just be saying that she doesn't want it to work so I leave her alone? Will the space calm her down? Do you have any advice for no contact?
  • 1 Week
    Vote A
  • 2 Weeks
    Vote B
  • 3 Weeks
    Vote C
  • 1 Month
    Vote D
  • Longer
    Vote E
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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 2

  • When someone has decided that they don't want to be with you then they usually mean that with some sense of permanence, regardless of what they might say at the time. Some people do separate and get back together but those are really the minority of cases and even when they do get back together they often break up for good soon afterwards.

    No contact is not about leaving a fixed time for the other person to realise that they miss you and want you back. That MAY happen but it's not the point. No contact is to allow you to move on without a constant reminder of the person. If they stay in your life but don't want you then it draws out the torture.

    So, the answer is that no contact should be seen as long term, if not permanent. If someone is going to miss you then that will happen regardless of whether you are in touch or not. You can't force them to want you back, unfortunately. You have to just get on with your life on the basis that you are now single, so that you can get stuck into the healing. The chances are that you will have to face the healing process sooner or later.

    • Im only doing it because she asked for it. I would much prefer to stay in contact. I think she asked for it because she is hot headed and just needs time to calm down. Im just using it as time to work out, focus on school and better myself. At the end of the day if she doesn't want to be together again it her choice im starting to come to terms with that. I appreciate your answer!

  • Dude.. You dated her for 3 years! If you dont know by now then how would we know?


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