So many people assume that you shouldn't be as hurt if you're the one who's breaking it off... but having just gone through breaking up with someone myself, I don't see how anything could be harder than this. On top of the grieving of the relationship and missing the other person, there's a huge sense of guilt in knowing that you're causing all of this, and that there's no one to blame but yourself, even if the reasons for calling it off were legit.
I would much rather be the one who's been dumped, rather than do the dumping...
- To be the one initiating the break upVote A
- To be broken up withVote B
Most Helpful Guy
Well I've never had a relationship so I've never had a break up. But I've had situations where I ended it with girls I was seeing and ones who ended it with me and I say ones where they ended it with me whether they ghosted me or just flat out said excuses, sorry this isn't working out or I'm not interested in pursuing this.
While hearing I'm not interested anymore is better than being ghosted, you still over analyze and wonder what the fuck you did for them to end it with you. If they ended it with you, it was for a reason.0
Most Helpful Girl
It all depends, I broke up w/my ex and it was very hard to do, I still loved him, but I was sick of being mistreated. In some cases the dumper doesn't suffer and in others the one being dumped doesn't suffer. It isn't shallow to stop something from hurting you, I have no guilt leaving my ex. I didn't do it in a humiliating way, I broke up w/him in person, in private. From my experience a break up isn't the only thing that ended the relationship, when you already reached that point, the relationship was already doomed. The break up isn't the cause all to heartbreak, there was something already happening that was causing that heartbreak. Never feel guilty for breaking it off w/someone that is causing you emotional/mental/physical pain. It takes an extremely strong person to break up w/someone they love, if they don't the other person will drag them through the ringer.0