Breakup, trust, deceit and slitted wrist!! Worst experience in life PLEASE ADVICE IM DESPERATE?

Well.. I had a best friend with whom I used to share everything with. My thoughts, my feelings, my emotions and 2 years ago our ex was the same guy. The ex was cheating on both of us and he used me.
2 years later, me and that girl are very close. She knows a lot about me and my boyfriend because I had placed a lot of trust into her. I regret this but she clearly knew which I had told her with my own mouth, what had happened with the ex 2 years ago. He used me for sex and I was only 16 at that time. The ex begs her till date to her to get back with him whereas he used me and played with my emotions at that time back then.

My best friend, told my boyfriend everything and as a result it's ended up into a break up. Because my boyfriend thought I'd not been clear about my past with him. But he was my present and future. I'd just forgotten mentioning this incident to him and I never knew that he'd break up over this.
I had said a lot of crap to my best friend aswell when I was angry and she probably screenshotted it and sent it to him.
When my boyfriend found out he did not even mention it to me till 2 weeks later. That girl also who was my best friend changed all off a sudden at 3am I called her up as we was having a late night convo asking what happened she goes to me 'leave your boyfriend alone, he's my friend' I was shocked and I was so deeply hurt with all this drama and the break up that I cried for 3 days in my room and cut myself of course that didn't solve anything. Then I agreed to being friends with my boyfriend and till present we are only friends but nothing's Normal and my feels have not died, I still love him. Should I block him to get away, I'm losing myself like this? Or should I be just friends with him in the hope of getting him back? I'm confused. He ignores my texts anyways and I'm the one who calls and everything

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Cut your losses, not yourself.

    Your friend is obviously not your friend. Your boyfriend is a loser if he takes everything she said at face value and breaks up without discussing it with you first.

    I know you're hurting (sorry) but everyone goes through that at some point. You simply need better people in your life. These two are not worth it. You're at a transitional time in your life. If you're a senior in HS, it will be over in a few months and you can move on to work or college or technical school and it will be different and better.

    If family is good, focus on family. You'll get through this.

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    • Thanks a lot for the advice, appreciate it! 🙂

    • You're welcome. Take care. :-)

Most Helpful Girl

  • Nobody in this situation is your real friend. People who use you, abuse you, or blame you for their problems are not your friends. You basically need to drop all of them, move on with your life, and find new friends. That might seem hard to your age because high school is all about having friends and being popular, but chances are you won't keep in contact with anybody after graduation anyway (I only talk to my best friend now because it's been 3+ years and I moved away). Life and real friends and relationships start after high school when your brain has developed enough to handle those complicated emotions

    This is what happens when you give guys sex without them being committed to you first. Guys your age are flooded with testosterone and will screw anything with a hole. It's best to lay out common ground and know the other side is committed to you before having sex otherwise feelings will get hurt

    Self harm is not the answer. If it hurt, then know to never do it again. If it didn't hurt and actually made you feel better, then you need to seek professional help because you have serious deep-rooted problems that cause you to detach from reality. Self harm is a vicious cycle that always gets worse before it gets better. If you want to improve your life, then never cut yourself again

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    • We haven't had sexual contact, it was just us meeting up and spending some valuable time together. Thanks a lot for the advice tho Xxx

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What Guys Said 2

  • I smell so many lies. I really doubt he would break up with you for being essentially used, and considring this came from your "best freind" I doubt again that she told the real story or truth, sounds more like she lied through her teeth.

    Sounds also like she is interested in him rather really, if she really was friends with both of you, she would rather try to mend the relationship rather than purposly try to break it up. Not like that she can't be friends with him when he is your boyfriend either, of course she can. Seems more like again that your boyfriend and you have become freinds after your best freinds request in a way. Naturally its none of her business really the relationship, but yeah you should be careful with that one. To me it seems more like she's playing you both, maybe thats what happen in the past also with this ex from 2 years ago.

    My recommdation, if you haven't. You should tell your side of the story of what happen 2 years ago, and ask him too what she said or how her story about it all was, bet it dosent match anyway.

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    • Another thing is, I never was aware that they both used to talk to each other (my best friend and boyfrind) of course I came I realise that later because he hadn't know what happened 2 years ago and who else could have told him than her. Also, he used to deny at first when I used to tell him that she's saying this and that. The girl was laughing at me afters she was like he told u everything hahahaha but I wouldn't know what to believe because she's good at mind games!

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    • I see, but yeah then there really is no point to bother with any of them. Not real friends and not worth your time either of them.

    • Yh, thanks a lot for the advice tho. Appreciate your time you've taken to advise :) God bless you! xx

  • just forget about both of them and sleep well, ull probably find someome u really like later

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