I've only been with my boyfriend for 9 months but he suffers from depression and insecurity. For the past couple of months we just seem to keep arguing all the time. I can only see him once a week because of work etc which he says is fine, but then he shouts at me for only seeing him that much and says it's not normal. And everyone he's spoken to says I'm "not normal". When I'm out st can't reply to him, I'll have about 3 messages and 3 missed calls so I start stressing. When I call him out on it he always apologises and says he doesn't know why he acts the way he does. This just goes round in circles all the time. He says he just wants to make things better between us. But then a week later he rings me and asks what's going on again because I've not been replying to him. I've explained I can't have my phone glued to me (I've never gone a day not replying to him just to clarify). He doesn't really have any friends, he lives in his own, his dad left him when he was 5 and his mum is critically ill in intensive care with possible permanent brain damage... so I almost feel like I can't leave him because he will have nobody. He's always saying I'm the only good thing his life and I'm the only thing worth getting up for. But I'm not happy I just feel constantly stressed in the relationship, but I feel trapped because of his situation with his mum etc :(
Most Helpful Guy
You are letting yourself succumb to your own emotional blackmail. You are not responsible for any problems he has. He can seek professional help to sort them out. I know you feel obliged to stay with him and help sort his problems out, but in the end, it is very likely that he will drag you down, too. There is also a chance that his insecurities could lead to abuse if you don't meet his expectations.
You cannot live your life to satisfy the needs of someone else when your own needs go unfulfilled.
It will hurt, and cause upset, but don't stay in this relationship like some abused ladies do.1
Most Helpful Girl
Well I can see why you don't want to break up with him. That's because he doesn't have anyone else except you. You can leave the relationship. You can always be there as a shoulder to lean on for him.
You also need to take into account what you want and don't want in your life. Right now I feel like you know what you don't want but you can't seem to break free from it because you're in to deep. I don't think there is anything wrong with that though.1