I met a guy, dated for five months and he decided that we wanted different things in life so he ended things. I was really hurt, always replaying what I did wrong in my head, had to get closure myself because I never really understood why he left. He unfriended me on social media and after a month he deleted his profile. I never heard from him again. One day I sent him a message asking about his family and he never replied. After four months he wrote me again, stating he had seen me and if I was seeing someone because he wanted to ask me out. At first I thought he was going to apologize or give me an explanation as to why he really left and came back like nothing happened but nothing. I asked him about everything and he would just change the subject. We went out after a week, he was great, joking and acting like before. We had a great time and then he drop me home. Something was telling me that something was not right and since I couldn't ask the questions I wanted in person I sent him a message just to get some clarification as to what was going to happen now, why he left and why he came back. He only answered that he was going to take the time to answer my message. So I waited two days and nothing, not even a good morning and that's when I told him to not contact me again, that I just wanted to know how he felt about us not do a research paper, that I deserve respect and the truth only hurts once, I could have handle anything he said, I just wanted to know how he felt. But I felt he was playing me that's why I told him not to contact me again. His answer "Damn its not even like that, I've worked 12 hours this week" but he was on social media again posting comments on pictures and adding new people. To be honest I feel kind of bad now because I told him not to contact me again, I dont know why, I guess I feel like maybe I didn't wait long enough for him to give me an explanation or something like that. He hasn't said anything else after that.
Told a guy to stop contacting me after breaking up with me and coming back again. Did I do the right thing?
What Guys Said 1
From a relationship coaching perspective, let me emphatically state that you did nothing wrong by tellling him not to contact you again. We teach people how to treat us by virtue of what we expect (communication, respect) and what we accept (silence, inconsistent behavior). You decided you weren't going to accept the silence and inconsistent behavior.
You probably feel bad because it's in your nature to be a giver and pleaser.1
What Girls Said 1
You know I always think: no reply is a reply. You did the right thing, you want someone who is crazy about you but this guy just sounds unsure.1
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